I just read a short article about George Obama, Barack Obama's half-brother who lives in Kenya. At the end of the article they have George as quoted, "I think in life, what you want is what you are supposed to get."

Immediately I thought, "well, how naive. That's most definitely not how things work." And then I moved onto thinking about how, when interviewing someone, you never really know if what they say is what they mean, or if they just go with something because it sounds good.

Obviously I'm not suggesting this is the case in this example, but it just got me thinking of what is necessary to prevent this. I would assume that part of the responsibility lies with the interviewer--that a conversation must arise in order for the individual to forget that they are being recorded. For that person to stop censoring themselves before they speak.

But then I question that. This summer we were consistently encouraged to "create the conversation" but I found myself confused when I went to the health department to interview a woman on the smoking cessation program. It's no secret that I hate smoking-I don't understand the appeal, especially when we have so much knowledge about the risks associated with the habit. I mean, we don't sit in our house when it's on fire and take a deep breath in, so why would we pay to puff clouds of smoke almost 20 times a day?? Anyways, as a journalist I'm supposed to be "objective" and have a conversation at the same time. This time it was hard. I found myself agreeing when this woman went on a 10 minute tangent about the tobacco companies---the deceiving ways they market their products and their dishonest ways throughout history. I mean, when listening to this, how can you not respond with "wow" or "I don't get it either"?? And is this ok? And then what about those "leading questions"? Those that may encourage a response? I didn't think I had an agenda that day, but what about the fact that I am so strongly against smoking? Is this a conflict of interest? I didn't think so when I volunteered for the story. And I'm assuming things would have been a bit different had I been a smoker myself. But then I definitely could have had a case for holding a bias.

But I think by having some opinion in the interview, I held the conversation. I don't believe that the interviewee at any time was censoring herself. I mean, it's possible since she's speaking for a government service, but it wasn't obvious. And I believe that she was saying what she meant. Personally she has been passionate about the negative results of smoking for years and it came through in the interview.

I, on the other hand, have trouble with this idea. I can only think of two instances where I actually said exactly what I meant. Where I said something without thinking of the impact the words would have. These two times things just flew out of my mouth and once they were said, I thought, "wow, I didn't even see that coming." But I meant them.

I'm not content and I'm not 100% sure why.

I have an inkling, but unfortunately I don't see this "problem" resolving itself anytime soon. Lets just say I need to stop watching those stupid gushy movies that "Oxygen" continues to play over and over.

I really want to watch "Almost Famous" sometime in the next week.

And I want a challenge. A hunt, one might say.

"look into your heart and you'll find lovelovelove

.....

and it's our god-forsaken right to be lovedlovedloved"

I have become unpredictably boy crazy this summer and I'm not sure from where this has stemmed except I can tell you that if you were to reach over and tickle my knee right now I would probably break into a fit of giggles, falling off of my chair. And I would like it.

Summer is steadily making it's way towards Autumn, leaving me with a small amount of time to condense my expectations and hopes for these past three months into three short weeks.

Music has made a strong comeback into my life, providing me with an overbearing amount of inspiration for things in my life. While I'm enjoying it, I'm not getting much accomplished and I'm rather distracted, finding myself daydreaming about things that otherwise will never happen.

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