THE PASSIE TRAUMA-- part II
After Ju-Ju had interrupted our school work for the bazillionth time on Thursday morning, I realized that there might be more at work than her typical quest for attention and a mild case of the 3-yr old naughties. I offered many attempts, at finding something fun to occupy her.
ME: Do you want to play play-dough at the table with us? . . .or play with your stamp kit?
JU-JU: No, I want you make this bear sing!
Me: O.K. well, we don't have the right kind of batteries for that bear, but maybe I can buy some. Right now I need to finish reading this story to Anna and Caleb. It's aaaalmost done; do you want to listen too?
JU-JU: I want batteries in this bear NAAAAOW!
ME: O.K. I got that, but we don't have any right now. Why don't you sit in my lap, while I finish this story (*continues reading).
At this point, she launched the Happy Birthday bear at my head. I stayed surprisingly calm. I couldn't have yelled, even if I had wanted to, because I had a full-blown case of laryngitis (thanks to my cold and a kick-ball game at Learning Grove, that I'd refereed earlier in the week). I calmly picked her up, carried her into my bedroom, gave her a swift swat on the leg, and then sat on the bed and hugged her. She didn't need a lengthy explanation. She doesn't see other people in the house launch toys at each others' heads. My heart ached for her a little, when she said dejectedly, "I want my passie/blankie." She has referred to them as one item, for quite some time, and she has payed little attention to her blankie, since the passie went missing. Then she told me, "I want you get me a new passie, and I keep it!"
Now, feeling like the meanest Mom in all the earth, I explained, "Oh, but you are such a big, 3yr old girl, and you're doing such a good job without your passie."
Again dejected, "But I weeeeawy want one."
Here I moved into my 'milk and a movie' distraction method, which has worked well for this week or two (or however long it's been). She is usually only mentioning the passie once a day or even every couple of days, at this point. When she does, I say, "Let Mommy get you some milk in your cup, and you can pick out a movie." Aside: This plan does come unraveled at bedtime, because I refuse to give her milk at bedtime-- only b/c I already have one kid with a mouth full of crowns-- in baby teeth-- long story.
"Would you like Mickey Mouse or Peter Pan?"
"NONE!"
"O.K. what movie would you like Ju-Ju?"
"Beauty and the Beast"
"Beauty and the Beast. Of course. Well, Beauty and the Beast went back to the library." An explanation followed, about how we had been borrowing it from the library and now it was someone else's turn.
"I want we get it NAAAAOW!" (*dissolving into tears)
. . .And that was how our morning began. The day improved, but I saw other symptoms of her displaced passie aggression, when she was being uncharacteristically bullyish to her [yes, older] brother. Fortunately, she hasn't mentioned it in a couple of days now, and I'd like to think that we're 3/4 of the way out of the woods. Is that too optimistic? Whatever the case, I still maintain that we've come too far to turn back now.
. . .So, if you're still hung up on the spanking that occurred early in the blog, feel free to tell me why I AM, in fact, the meanest Mommy on the planet. I can handle it, and I'll be glad to defend myself. Did I just open a colossal can of worms there? --that will completely over-shadow the passie story? Eh, maybe. | 
Have a great weekend! ~Lori
