Yesterday, had my dad lived he would of been 92 yrs. old  I don't remember exact dates any more, I do remember dad.

http://www.mizbee.net/dedicate.htm  a page of rememberence for him and hub's brother Bill. 

I'm mindful of this as I prepare for the news about Terry. We need to face it, death happens to us all, some sooner, some later. Can we ever prepare? Deep down I don't think so. We always have hope some miracle will occur. We express our frustration that as modern as medicine is that so many have pain. But are they feeling it as those who watch them?  Is that restlessness so often seen pain or just a struggle to either stay or depart?

I remember telling my friend Coral as she left for England to be at her mother's bedside, to express to her comatose mother that it was OK to go that she would be fine.  When she returned after the funeral she thanked me for that advise. She said she could literally see her mom's body relax after she told her that and shortly thereafter she died.

When I worked in the hospital I saw so many struggling to live for their loved ones, and once the loved ones either were gone or bid them goodbye they died in peace.

We have to remember due to legal restraints we can't ask doctor's to drug them so much that they die from the drugs. And as I told daughter after her significant other died this year, "remember the vacant look in his eyes as you talked to him? he wasn't there, his tossing and turning doesn't mean he felt the pain you preceived".  She concurred and felt some better that he knew she was there before he was 'out of it'.

We all want a quick painless death. We want that for our loved ones as well. Perhaps suffering is sometimes present so we will remember they are leaving for a better place.

The following gives me comfort.

We Remember Them

 In the rising of the sun and in its going down,
 We remember them;
 In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter,
 We remember them;
 In the opening of buds and in the warmth of summer,
 We remember them;
 In the rustling of leaves and the beauty of autumn,
 We remember them;
 In the beginning of the year and when it ends,
 We remember them;
 When we are weary and in need of strength,
 We remember them;
 When we are lost and sick at heart,
 We remember them;
 When we have joys we yearn to share,
 We remember them;
 So long as we live, they too shall live,
 for they are now a part of us as
We remember them.

from Gates of Prayer -Reform Judasism Prayer Book