I've made some more friends at work.  A girl called Claire invited me to her house last night.  When I got there I saw another girl from work called Sahair, who's been asking me out everyday at work, but she's a minger so I've just politely changed the subject everytime.  There were three asian looking guys there who I didn't know, but I was soon introduced and I soon forgot their unfamiliar names.  Hell, it took me 7 months just to learn the name Sahair.

The evening was just plain wrong from the start.  I noticed that there was a complete lack of cigarettes, alcohol and gear.  We sat and watched tv... Then Sahair makes the situation go from bad to worse when she demands that we turn off the tv as it's antisocial.  The tv was turned off and we sat in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes before kicking off a conversation about something fucking boring and meaningless.  I was about to claim that I thought I'd left my oven on at home and walk out.  However, Claire's Hungarian friend Livia turned up and she was very attractive so I thought I'd just stay for a bit longer and try and chat her up.

I heard dog's whimpering from the other room and Claire explained that she had just bought an Alsatian puppy.  I love dogs and asked to see it, but the guest freaks in the room all blurted out that they didn't like dogs and would prefer it if I didn't let it into the room.  I paused for thought and really began to dislike Claire's friends.  Who the fuck doesn't like puppies?!  Then the whole evening went tits up.  Sahair suddenly came out with the disturbing statement, "Let's all do a bible study!"  I raised my eyebrows so far up my head that it hurt.  I said, "Is that slang for something or are you being sarcastic?" refusing to believe what she just said.  Little did I know that a couple of hours ago I unwittingly walked into the weekly god squad meeting.  I felt physically sick and went to the lavatory and washed my face.

When I returned I found the conversation had changed to why Livia didn't like French people.  Personally I hate the French, I generalise, but in general I do.  So I put the boot in too and slated everything about them that I could think of.  I turns out that the three unpronouncables in the room were all of French origin and I upset them so much that they left shortly afterwards.  I had by chance played my trump card and was left with Claire, the lovely Livia, the georgeous puppy and the tv.

However I didn't score and there's no way in hell that I will return to that house as long as I live.