Because I'm a Toys'R'Us Kid.Kids say the darndest things.Kindergarten teacher: What do you want to be, Christopher?Me: A veterinarian! So I can eat all the doggies in the whole wide world!Kindergarten teacher: Oh...Growi…
Your Travel Guide.
Her: So what's there to do in ny? I know there's A LOT, but I don't know where to start.
Me: Ah..I'm the worst to ask that to. I rarely venture into NYC, but I'd say all the tourist spots. Yeah, I'…
You have 3.46 seconds to decide: Boy or Girl?The vote is on now!Have someone who you think has a gender confusion issue? Send in a photo and maybe it'll be featured on this site!
A Measurement For Sex.Cliffnotes.I'll take you, and you, and you...Tip #1Bra sizes in my eye: A for Asian B for Bouncy C for Caucasian D for dizzamn!Tip #2The number (32, 34, 36, etc) = the number of
people who want to …
Who Wants to Play Airport Roulette?We'll head to the airport and catch the first flight to a destination we've never been to for 1 week. $800 limit. Spontaneous much?BINGO!If you could fly to any destination right now, w…
Text Messaging (C)Raze.I'll admit, I was
opposed to mobile phones when I started seeing them pop up in my high
school like those mysterious red dots around your crotch after doing
that prostitute. Who did these kids t…
Like a What?Keep that train rolling!omg, they'd be all over you like a fat kid at a buffet.Posted 5/25/2008 1:47 PM by Meunonomo @Meunonomo - like an anorexic over a toilet bowl.Posted 5/25/2008 1:48 PM by CaKaLusa @Ca…
Anyone from NY want to meet up? Anyone from London want to meet up? Telectroscope allows Londoners, New Yorkers to see each other in real time Wow, I can see the bad oral hygiene from here in NY!Plans for Memorial Day…
Rising Fuel Costs.A Conspiracy Theory. It's
been years since I've come to terms that the citizens of North America
are being barred from the truth. I've amassed hours in the hundreds,
the past year reading article upo…
Women, Pack Your Bags!All women should consider living in R/Vs. Seriously, what is up with
women and not just overpacking, but bringing half their wardrobe with
them on vacations? A weekend trip requires them to head o…
18 Things A Grown Man Should Never Have.Men's health. What else should a man not have, besides the following...?1.A black eye. Unless the rim hits your face mid-dunk, your peepersshould remain unblemished. You're s…
Why East Asians are skinny and you're huge, fatty. Curse that terribly angled mirror!
So that pair of jeans turning your belly into a muffin top? That's a
shame. But there's help as usual, besides liposuction or kil…
Things a Man Should Never Do in the Company of a WomanRants from a female perspective.Reveal how much your car cost.Clean your gun.Polish high school trophies (which you still have displayed).Refer to your mother as your…
The Weirdest Lines I've Heard from Drunks
6. Dude, you talk like a f*cking lawyer. (late-night LIRR train)
5. I swear I'm not drunk. (at bar, having his 5th martini. In an hour)
4. I can't feel my face!! (man sleepi…
What's In a Name?"I now pronounce you husband and wife!"But do you also accept her last name? "Her?
What?" In some cases, though rare and far in between, some marriages
have presented males with changing their last nam…
Office Rants.The following are letters written during office hours, after a few agitating moments.THE MICROWAVE IS NOT YOUR PERSONAL HOME OVENDear "Captain Fische",I
have held my tongue on this subject long enough. I wi…
Photoblog: Dumbo District.
Night time photography. I probably take worse pictures than you.
Dumboooo.
Mr. Chang playing with his new 30d. "D" is for dildo.
Halo (3?)
Which is th…
Eating Expired Beef.It's what's for dinner.Spring
Cleaning. A time when dust inhalation is at an all-time high, and you
discover a nest of nostalgia under your bed. Besides sneezing up a
storm, I pulled out from under…
NY Autoshow.Practically the same thing as last year.Zoom zoom!Sweet!Go, go, Speedracer, go!Halo Warthog?Richard Branson?Arrrrr, m8ty.The
laziest "model" around. She sat there for a good 60 minutes, as she was
still the…
What Firstborn?When I accidentally get a girl pregnant, I’m probably going to freak out. I know this will probably happen atsome time. It would be hard to make her have an abortion that would bemy fault. I kno…
An Epic Battle for the Office's TV.There’s a war going on in many workplaces. The objective: take control of the TV. Master the thermostat, the rest will follow!Agroup of co-workers and I enjoy watching "World's Most…
My mom is better than your mom.Well, if you don't have a mother, this joke would probably make me feel terribly guilty.
Please, do not comment.by the way i think you should try writing a post and tell people not to comment. see who comments.Posted 5/4/2008 11:00 PM by jam_on_pancake
Feast On Love. Not that kind of feast. But I'll take this regardless.To me, a feast of love is
any instant (or hour or lifetime) when human beings exchange affection.
It's true that sometimes we head hopefully toward w…
Hello, From the Future.A 14 year old me and my twins. This is how we settled things.Xanga has implemented a new feature: Future/past posting. It allows you to edit the time in which you want your post to show. Need it to…
The AzN Keyboard.Another quality Cakalusa-branded product. The next big thing in Japan!Some assembly required.Want in on the AzN craze?Love your "caps lock" key randomly pressed?Enjoy having your keys misplaced on the ke…
A Cakalusa Research Study On: Sex & the City.Having wondered
why so many women across America obsess over this show called "Sex
& the City", I decided to do a little research. I headed to my
local Blockbuster…
Tired of the Neighbors.At work, there is
a wall that separates people from staring at each other's fugly mugs
for 9 hours a workday. Unfortunately, it's not thick enough. So when
this female co-worker (not my departme…
Bastid Cakalusa Strikes Again!Reason why you should never ask me to plan your bachelor party #39.To
cause a huge ruckus, I'm going to plan a friend's bachelor party at a
gay night club. "Dude, is it just me or are ther…
Sizing up.Overheard in the office break room.Me: Let me see it.Him: Here.Me: Oh, pretty big. But mine's bigger.Him: Really? It's a little longer, but mine's thicker.Me: Yeah, a little. Let me feel yours.Him: Sure. Lemme …
Cakalusa's Nuts.A picture story featuring my salty nuts.A
rather pleasant day at the park. Some enjoying lunch under the shade,
others tossing a frisbee, and many others soaking in the rare April sun.Furthering
my str…
True
Premium