Conference Call

I love it when God confirms things in a persons life. I went to the Beth Moore conference this past weekend. It was such a blessing. Several ladies from my church and others in the area, hopped on a bus and took off to Nashville. I was able to meet some women in the church that I had only seen from a distance. They were amazing. We had Bible study on the way. We loved and laughed with each other. My Sister and Mom went too. Speaking of which. My Mom needs alot of prayer right now. She is getting so far away from the Lord at the moment. Any fruits we may have caught a glimpse of before are gone. I am scared that she has just been playing the church game. I pray that is not the case.

My sister learned alot. The message the women at the conference gave us set us free. Praise God!!! To HIM be the glory!!! She has finally realized that if God has forgiven you, and called you back to HIS ministry, that you are only letting Satan hamper Gods goodness when you continue to roll around in guilt. The message impowered us both. I am trusting that Gods message will not come back void with my mom. Seeing alllllll those women praising God. Loving Him, and Reaching out for HIM. It was amazing. I never really thought of how big my family was in Christ until I saw over 23,000 women lifting their voices to praise HIM.

When I was at church this past sunday... I just sat back and watched my family from the choir loft. They are funny. The older women were the worst. LOL. They were irritating the young children then shushing them.       A bit honery, yes, but it was precious at the same time. I saw the love of wives for their husbands. The women would be leaning back on their husbands, or vice versa, and soaking in the WORD that was preached. I finally just watched... With the love for my family GOD has given me. They are my family, HE adopted them as well as me. It is just amazing.

Next time you are in church. Just look around. They are your spiritual family. Your adopted siblings. HEHE. I am adopted, I am a special kid you see, I am proud to be a member, of the royal family.

I don't understand

I know we are not supposed to put our trust in man. I am in pain right now. God is Good! He is always Good. I feel betrayed. I really do. I was approached and hurt by words said. Rhonda and I will not be singing a duet. She didn't even want to try it out for a bit. I know, if she did, she would have had the solo. It is the whole bowing to authority thing. Yes, that means I got the solo. Completely. No duet. I hate that she was hurt though. She is going through so much. I just cry at the descension that is going on right now. I am being shunned, ignored, laughed at. If I was so horrible, would I have been given the part? Johnny is a perfectionist. I know God has changed my voice for just this song. God speaks to me through this song. I have been the outcast all my life. I never fit in. That was in the "world" though. This is my church family. There are some women trying to lift me up. They are loving on me and encouraging me. I just really hurt over the 3 that are treating me like trash. I really was bonding with one of them. She was someone I looked up to. I still pray for her. I love her. I just feel hurt seeing the maliciousness in my sisters. It makes me doubt myself. I know that is not of God. Satan is having fun with me right now. I hate it when he uses Gods family to strike at the heart of a person. I know what I have to do. Pray, read, trust in God. That is a given. The pain is still there. I know no one reads this, so its all good.

Wow, I wasn't expecting that

Before I get to the wow. I will make another log in my site about the growth of my kids. Ajay is now 9 years old. I measured him a week ago and he was 4'7". Robert is now 4'2 1/2". He is catching up with his brother. He scares me. Also on log. Ajay is getting a darker mustache. Robert is asserting himself more. They are growing sooo fast. Ajay past his pre-algebra test. Yes, I said pre-algebra. He is awesome at math. If he can get it, why should I slow him down? Tiffany is in algebra and is ready for geometry. She loves math too. Robert? Goodness, that boy doesn't want to read because his brother and sister will do it for him. He just doesn't want to. Unless he is reading a sign on the highway and wants to go to the place advertised.

Socks is now one year old. He was the black kitten that I fed and took care of when his mom left him. Wayne told me that he did not want another indoor cat and he would be strickly outdoors. I wasn't even allowed to bring him in. Well, Wayne brought him in in November and he has been inside ever since. So much so that he was neutered and declawed. What gets me is that "I" was the one to love on him daily. "I" was the one who fed him. "I" played with him because he was wild. Now whos cat do you think he is? Waynes! Thats who! So, not fair.

Ohhhhh, I have an answered prayer. God is good. Even though my cat leaves and forsakes me, God will still love me and be there for me. I prayed that if He truly wanted me to sing solo that He would allow me to sing with Rhonda. She is a beautiful singer. She can sing soul and reverent and just bring it on the fast and fun songs. I figured that if I am not in the praise team, and have no experience in front of a microphone. That it would maybe be easier if I were to do a duet with one of our best singers. That way it is not just me. Well, Wayne signed me up to try for a solo. He told me he wanted me to try it because it is fast and he wants to hear me sing out. SO, out of obedience to my husband I practiced, and practiced. I tried out for him, but he told me I was still signed up to tryout at the church. Well, I tried out. Out of obedience mind you. I never would have thought of singing this song because I don't have the right voice for it. I was wrong. Our music teacher made the solo a duet. She does the soulful parts and I get the booming, high parts. I was not expecting this. I am still numb. I am rotating between weeping in awe of Gods plan and just not believing He would choose me. I am nothing to look at. I am not near as faithful as I should be. Yet, He keeps changing my voice and allowing me to tap into His strength.

I am going to go cry now. I will talk to you later. God Bless and know you are in my prayers dad. I am making these notations for you and me. Love you, Ann

Its Been a While

To all moms out there with teenagers... I have good news. God still loves you. LOL. This is not the end. I would like to suggest a book that has completely turned my little girl around, "Understanding Every Young Girls Battle". They have one for men and women and teen boys. I do not know who the author is now, but they have several crowns waiting for them in heaven. I am also working with a book called "Respectful Kids" by Dr. Rodd Cartmell. It explains how to bring the best out in your kids. They are good christian books that are OHHHH so helpful.

I am writing this part as more of a marker in time than anything. Tiffany, who is not yet 13, is now taller than me. Not by much though. I can still take her down. HEHE. She is 5'7". Ajay, he will be 9 in May, is now right at 4'6". Only a foot to go to be around my height. Robert is only 5" shy of his brothers height. It is scary because he is only 6 yrs old. The boys are skinny. I can't keep them fed. They eat all day long and gain absolutely NO weight. It is sad when a single little boy can eat as much as you and your hubby. For breakfast alone they will eat 2 bowls of cereal, toast, an apple, an orange, sometimes and egg and still be hungry. I have to stock all the houses we visit because my kids eat all the time. They clean out friend and family frigerators.

Ajay lost another tooth. Robert hasn't lost any yet. I am expecting that by Christmas we will be able to teach him the "All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth" song. HEHE. Can't wait myself. God is good! So far I have gotten to teach the others that song because they lost their teeth by Christmas. Tiff tried to whistle through it and Ajay just slapped his forehead and said " Mom... thats not very funny you know." I thought it was. He is such a stick in the mud anyway. HEHE. Until he turns your words around and says "Oh, Burn!". He is a hoot at times. Robert is my little sister incarnate, with a loving heart. They were sitting next to each other the other night. He could be her child. They look so much alike. Then he squinted his eyes and looked at her. She did the same back and told him " I don't know what your about to do, but its not good." About that time he gets up to fix her hair. NOT! He roughs it up and messes it into her face. Then decided to get some weeds and grass and rub in there. Well, that started a cat and mouse game.

God Is Awesome

God just totally blew me away last week. My prayers were answered. My hubby made it safe and didn't have to drive alone. He called me Tuesday night and 6pm to tell me that some of the guys were taking their wives and kids. That the hotel was cool with it. (Now mind you he was leaving out the night he called around midnight). He asked me to call the hotels and check if it would be okay to bring the kids and how much more it would cost. The hotel in St. Augustine said only $10 more. Because we would have 5 not 4 people in the room. That was doable. So we called the main hotel in Jacksonville. They switched our rooms with NO extra cost. Now, I know it wasn't a second honeymoon and we didn't get time alone, but we were together.

As it happened.I was able to make all the changes by phone in 30min.(By the grace of God) Then had to get the kids ready to go to town. My tire on my vehicle blew the night before and I had to fix it, get an oil change and try to get a transmission leak under control enough to drive the van not hubby's car.I finally got home from that around 8:30 pm. I had right at an hour to pack for me and the kids to go on the trip. God is soooo good. He totally handled everything. We missed the icy front that was supposed to be in Georgia and Mississippi. It looked like it sprinkled in some parts, but was clear.

When we got there we enjoyed one of the best seafood places, museums and the beach. Though the tide kept pushing us inland, we got some really neat shells. All different kinds that the kids and I will be investigating. Also, we found a vertibrae. I will be looking it up soon to see if it is dolphin or not. But it is definately a vertibrae. It has the holes for the nerves and spinal cord.

It is snowy out today. We went outside to investigate all the prints then for play. We found little fawn prints on our front porch. The momma was a little further away, but they were there. From there we found that they go around the side of the house and bed down beside the house in the brush. Then,they leave across the back of the house and into the woods. We figure they do this because Wayne is up early in the morning and they feel safer leaving out the back than going in the front of the house. Now we are going to get up early to see if we can see them. At least the boys and I will. Tiff just wants to shoot and eat bambi. LOL. She is still convicted people. Praise God. And when she feels like it never happened, she feels even worse. I see fruit again. I haven't seen that from her since Aug. of last year.I will talk to you all later. Thank you for your prayers.