Well yesterday was pretty topsy turvy. I had alot of running around to do and then I had my daughters Open House for school. I wanted to meet with the teacher,find out how she(my daughter)is doin and get the hell outta there!! Is that what happened?? HELL NO!! lol First off they made us all go and sit in the gym so the new principle could bore us to death. Im pretty sure this will be the principles first and last year at our school. I now know why the kids in this school act like caged animals recently escaped...cuz even the parents cant shut the hell up!!! It was really ridiculous...you couldnt hear a word the principle was saying and she didnt even attempt to ask them to shut up...instead she tried to talk over all 100 of them(estimating). She is soooo NOT gonna be able to hang...I mean if you cant get the parents to shut up how will you ever get the kids to?? The old principle would have put em all in time out...LOL...no but really she was much more vocal and would have told them to chill the fk out!!! So anywayssss, I finally get up to my daughters class. Her teacher,Miss DelaCruz,is very strict...VERY!!! Im glad for this because I tend to be pretty hard on my daughter when it comes to school work,so it makes me more confident in our shitty school district to know that she has a GREAT teacher with alot o balls to stand up to even the parents!! I admit it has got to be harder then usual to be a teacher in the Cleve. public school system....where the smallest class is about 25 kids. My daughter is in 3rd grade,theres 27 other kids in her class. Miss DelaCruz broke it down for us letting us know that out of the 28 kids in this particular class..only 2 have the reading skills they should at this stage of the game,and MY BABYGIRL IS ONE OF EM!!*applause* Im so proud of her. See,all my bitchin does pay off. It was mentioned that 9 kids are still at the kindergarten level of reading and 13 are at 1st grade level. I ask......why the hell are they in the 3rd grade then?? It's easy to blame the past teachers BUT this is more then that. This is a sign of lazyass parents!!! All in all my daughter got a great review . I finally get the hell out of there,get home and well got a little down....must be the PMS monster again but I got over it.

so I started to go thru mail(lol you know what this means)

GIGGLE TIME............

How to shower like a woman.....

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper

according to lights and darks.

2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your

husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror-make mental note-must

do more sit-ups.

4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long

loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.

5. Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Sage shampoo with 43 added

vitamins.

6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

7. Condition your hair with Grapefruit Mint conditioner enhanced with

natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.

8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes

until red.

9. Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash.

10. Rinse conditioner off hair (you must make sure that it has all come

off).

11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to

get it waxed instead.

12. Scream loudly when your husband flushed the toilet and you lose the

water pressure.

13. Turn off shower.

14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with

Tilex.

15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.

16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit, tweeze hairs.

17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

18. If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas

and then sashay to bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed.

How To Shower Like A Man:

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave

them in a pile.

2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the way,

shake wiener at her making the "woo-woo" sound.

3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to

see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror

and scratch your ass.

4. Get in the shower.

5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).

6. Wash your face.

7. Wash your armpits.

8. Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just rinse it off.

9. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.

10. Majority of time is spent washing your privates and surrounding

area.

11. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs on the soap bar.

12. Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).

13. Make a shampoo Mohawk.

14. Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the mirror again.

15. Pee (in the shower).

16. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the

floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub the whole

time.

17. Partially dry off.

18. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Admire wiener size

again.

19. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.

20. Leave bathroom fan and light on.

21. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass

your wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her, and make the

"woo-woo" sound again.

22. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed.

ok on the topic of showers.....I am so sick n tired of shaving!!! You guys out there are probably like...."oh c'mon now...we have to shave everyday too". Not quite the same though....I mean if you forget to shave we really dont care(well at least not me,I love 5 o'clock shadow) but you try bendin over so far that it looks like youre tryin to stick your head up your own ass just so you dont miss anything!!! God forbid you miss a day too,cuz by the time the next day rolls around ya need some dam hedgetrimmers just to save the lifespan of your trusty little razor!! Oh and NEVER condition your hair before you shave....its like tryin to ice skate with your head up your ass!! Ive seen the late night infomercial for that "epil stop"....its a spray that you put on your legs and supposedly then you can just wipe the hair away.....WHATEVER!!!!! If any of you ladies have tried this,and it works....TELL MEEEEEE! Hell Ill spend 40 bucks on the shit if it means not having to turn into the human pretzel....lol. Oh now dont get me wrong,I have no problem with bending into a pretzel but um not for the satisfaction of shaving....now if it was for the satisfaction of gettin me some...HEY Im all for that!!!!

I will soon be overhaulng my page. Not to undo my patriotsm I got goin on here but I absolutely LOVE the fall....so Ill be going into the Autumn zone