well I never got a call today even though he said he'd call either way. Im kinda bummin but Im tryin to stay upbeat so heres some funnies for ya's
Enjoy.......

Two Party System
A lot of voters are getting a little bored with the 2-party system. Even
the Reform Party and the Libertarian Party aren't making much of a
showing this year. So we have created a list of the Top Ten independent
political parties we'd like to see in the next Presidential election.

10. The Crack Party... We're split down the middle.
 9. The Mouth Party... And you're invited to cum.
 8. The Gay/NRA Party... We're here, we're queer... YOU GOT A PROBLEM
WITH THAT?
 7. The Pity Party.. C'mon, we never win anything. Vote for us once,
will ya please?
 6. The Private Party... No comment.
 5. The Cocktail Party... Cock and Tail - does it get any better than
this?
 4. The Search Party... Looking for members.
 3. The Keg Party... Dude, we could so totally run the country.
 2. Non-partisan party... We believe in what you believe in.

 And the number 1 independent political party we'd like to see:
1. The Beaver Party... Oh, forget it - we've already got Bush.

If You Love It.........
If you love something, set it free.
If it comes back, it will always be yours.
If it doesn't come back, it was never yours to begin with.
BUT. . ..
. . . .If it just sits in your living room,
. . . .Messes up your stuff,
. . . .Eats your food,
. . . .Uses your telephone,
. . . .Takes your money,
. . . .And doesn't appear to realize that you had set it free.
. . . .Then, You either married it or gave birth to it!

EPT........
For any of you out there who is trying to conceive and using one of
those home pregnancy tests and can’t quite figure out the results,
here’s a handy little reference guide.

EPT (early pregnancy test) - Blue means not pregnant. Pink means
pregnant. Brown means you had it in the wrong hole.

Excuses Not To Have Sex........
10. I'd love to honey, but I just banged your sister.
 9. We're out of paper bags for your head again.
 8. You haven't shaved in so long I'm afraid I'd feel I was making love
to Big Foot.
 7. You're 20 bucks short.
 6. We're out of gin again.
 5. I used my last sponge for the dishes.
 4. Sorry, this isn't a conjugal visit.
 3. I can't tonight, honey, I spent myself earlier today watching all
those pornos.
 2. Only if you put on this wig and talk like a Chinese hooker.
 1. Your gynecologist just called - you still have crabs and you know
how I don't like seafood.

Q. Did you hear about the 13 yearr old boy that got hold of his fathers
Viagra?
A. They rushed him to the hospital with 3rd degree burns on his hands.

Niteeeeeeee