Wednesday, February 16, 2005

• Oh, my - Have we got a journal entry for you!

  Here is the long awaited entry to my journal; the one entry you felt that you needed to stop doing every thing that you were doing, and read that entry. Today is going to be a great day, as I am going to talk about my favorite subject - Punctuation - oh, the sweet smell of chaos un-folds. For most of my life I have been terrified of any subject related to grammer or punctuation. The very idea of english is hideous, and there have been many times where I sat in total frustration over a stupid paper assignment. How could any one stand to watch some one, that you didn't even know that well, and let them rip apart your paper?
  
  In my experience with writing a journal I have never took the time to proof-read the material I put into it. I personally felt no reason as to why grammer correction should important, and for a long time I threw grammer out the door. When some one else has a journal entry that I take a look at; I become the mean green English teacher with a skimpy dress on and that wig of white hair. Oh yeah, I become as bad as the baddest ever was. I absolutely dispise people that write like they are talking on AIM and trying to have a meaningful conversation. There are people out there that believe using silly abbreviations and smiley faces is a great tool to getting your point across. That is all fine-and-dandy until I come across it and have a heart attack. Ok - so I do not have a heart attack after witnessing poor grammer or punctuation skills of some of the writers on here, but I have felt it my duty to leave a mean comment in there box to express my un-appreciated migrane I received after reading the filth of crap I just read.
  
  Hold on, hold on - I never left a comment to some one that was channeled in a negetive way, but I have often thought that I should have. In my attempt to bring enlightment to the readers of this journal I thought it would be nice to share a story with you that I learned in high school and has helped me understand the very basics of punctuation. Enjoy!
  
  From The Comic Stories:
  "In 1885, Anton Chekhov wrote a Christmas short story called "The Exclamation Mark." In this light parody of A Christmas Carol, a collegiate secretary named Perekladin has a sleepless night on Christmas Eve after someone at the party offends him - by casting asperations on his ability to punctaute in a eduated way. I know this doesn't sound too promising, but stick with it, it's Chekhov, and the general rule is that you can't go wrong with Chekhov. At this party, the rattled Perekladin insists that, despite his lack of a university eduation, forty years' practice has taught him how to use punctuation, thank you very much. But that night, after he goes to bed, he is troubled; and then he is haunted. Scrooge-like, he is visited on this momentous Christmas Eve by a succession of spectres, which teach him a lesson he will never forget.
  

  And what are these spectres? They are all punctuation marks. Yes, this really is a story about punctuation - and first to disturb Perekladin's sleep is a crowd of fiery, flying commas, which Perekladin banishes by repeating the rules he knows for using them. Then come full stops; colons and semicolons; question marks. Again, he keeps his head and sends them away. But then a question mark unbends itself, straightens up - and Perekladin realizes he is stumped. In forty years he has had no reason to use an exclamation mark! He has no idea what it is for. The inferences for the reader is clear: nothing of any emotional significance has ever happend to Perekladin. Nothing relation, in any case, to the "delight, indignation, joy, rage and other feelings" an exclamation mark is in the business of denoting.

  As epiphanies go, this isn't quite the same as seeing Tiny Tim's ownerless crutch propped in teh inglenook, but Perekladin is affect none the less. The poor pen-pusher felt cold and ill at ease, as if he had caught typhus. The exclamation mark was no longer standing behind his closed eyes but in front of him, in the room, by his wife's dressingtable, and it was winking at him mockingly. What can poor Perekladin do? When he hails a cab on Christmas Day, he spots immediately that the driver is an exclamation mark. Things are getting out of hand. At the home of his chief, the doorman is another exclamation mark. It is time to take a stand - and, signing himself into the visitors' book at his chief's house, Perekladin suddely sees the way. Defiantly he writes his name, "Collegiate Secretary Yefim Perekladin" and adds three exclamation marks, "!!!" And as he wrote those three marks, he felt delighted and indignation, he was joyful and he seethed with rage. "Take that, take that!" he muttered, pressing down hard on the pen. And the phantom exclamation mark disappears." - Eats, Shoots & Leaves by Lynne Truss put this in her book, which I used to put in my journal.

  Most of us can't remember a time before we learned to punctuate. We perhaps remember learning to read and to spell, but not the moment when we found out that adding the symobl "!" to a sentence somehow changed the tone of voice it was read in. Luckily we are taught such stuff when we are young enough not to ask awkward questions, because the way this symbol "!" turns "I can't believe it's not butter" into "I can't believe it's not butter!" is the sort of dizzying convention that requires to be taken absolutely on trust. I chose this story because it displays every bit of punctuation to ever stand the test of time. Isn't it wonderful?

  When people write things that are understandable I tend to leave happy-feely comments for them to read when they return from there long day of work or school. I think in my old age I am becoming a stickler, and I really could care less if this is true. I know that some one will tell me that i put a period in the wrong spot or I used the wrong word. But this is ok, because I don't care. I'd rather mumble and grumble about some one elses journal then deal with my own - what fun is it to mock yourself?

  Honestly, I never knew that you could use a punctuation to say simple things. I had always thought that I colon was to be used when you were addressing a list of things. Or even a comma for list. But there are other contexts you could use these for. Just see how the sense changes with the punctuation in this example:

  Tom locked himself in the shed. Boston lost to New York.

  These two statements, as they stand, could be quite unrelated. They merely tell you two things have happened, in the past tense.

  Tom locked himself in the shed: Boston lost to New York.

  All is now clear. Tom locked himself in the shed because Boston Lost to New York. And who can blame him, that's what I say. Isn't grammer and punctuation fun? I could go on for days about the correct way to do a semicolon or a wonderful [sic]. Do you even know what the [sic] means? What about a ellipsis? I'll give you a hint...

  I do not expect much from the reading population out there but if you are going to give me things to read please be considerate of your grammer and punctuation for the sake of my sanity. And I do not think that every journal I read is a piece of crap, but they're a few out there that I would call questionable.

  This Weekend:
  As can be expected when I hang out with my lovely friends in Champaign it is always a thrill of a time. I left school on Friday at one and arrived in Champaign at 7; where upon I took Morgan out to dinner at a mexican restuarant, and then to hang out with Amy. Saturday we watched U of Illnois cream Iowa, then went out to the best restuarant that I have been in years (I had an amazing Filet Steak that was to die for), and we stayed in because of the wild night we had on Friday.

  I came back on Sunday with full intentions of doing nothing but the person that is in my group had not completed his part of the bargin, so I was stuck working on it for most of Sunday night. I wasn't exactly thrilled with that, but at least she used my proposal in class today. The weekend was an all out blast and I was very greatful to spend it with that special someone. I forget how much I miss him when I am not around him!

  As promised I tried to force the group to take as many pictures as they can and they did a fairly good job. Here they are:
  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  Remember Kiddies!  Alcohol and fun do not make for good pictures!  Can you tell who the life of the party is?

  School Progress:
  I have accomplished a lot this semester as I have taken up a more organized schedule. Did you get that? I'm attempting to be more organized - holy smokes, that is a miracle in itself. I still have a lot of difficulties cleaning my room and tiding it up for people to stop by. And I still tend to lose the most important things at the most unforunate of times, but it isn't the end of the world.

  I had taken all my classes exams in the last three weeks, and I have scored at least 88% or higher on every test (In other words, I got one B+ and the rest A's) and I blew my Advertising test out of the water. I got a perfect score on it! I was really shocked by this, but that is like when some one says they think they did really bad on a test (and they tell that to the person next to them and they agree) and then they get the test back and they aced it (and the person who they told they did bad to actually did horrible.) I was a little pissed off by the Trans Log exam, but I'll work it out with him.

  I had a really go discussion with my mom today while I was eating my sandwich about possible firms I could work with when I graduate. She had mentioned a firm that was in based out of Minneapolis called Fallon and said that she knew a few people there that could help me get a job when I graduated. I was quite impressed when I checked out the website (www.fallon.com) and I thought about maybe seeing if I could get a job shadow with them this summer or work with them there as an intern. But that is all in due process.

  Last Omens:
  As I finally finish this damn long entry I would like to thank all of the four people that continously comment on my site. If it were not for you guys I would probably have hung up the site a long time ago, or at least felt really depressed because NO one reads this thing. I try to get back to you guys; leaving me to only say that I think you guys rock and roll. You all know who you are!

  I just made the longest journal entry I have ever made.  I can do this because I am cool.  I know you all envy my coolness.  Yeah, I know I just rocked the house!

  Keep on rockin' in the free world,

  Bri

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