Wednesday, July 02, 2008

  • TUFF

    Currently Listening
    Mood Muzik 3: The Album
    By Joe Budden
    Send Him Our Love
    see related
    I sit.
    I think.
    I listen.
    I hurt.
    I hate.
    I love.
    I breathe.

    I'm just your average being.

    I haven't had it easy.
    But it hasn't been hard.

    I've lost friends.
    Both in and out of life.
    They're well missed.
    I think they know who they are.
    I want to apologize for any wrongs that I have done to anyone who reads this.


    I'm more happy than sad.

    I am in love with the most wonderful man ever. I have people that will have my back if I'm in trouble. I have the most wonderful brother in the world. I have a place to live. I have music that keeps my sanity. I have a crappy car, but it works right? No job, but I haven't lost hope. Keep searching...that's the my theory.

    There are some things I miss immensely though.

    I miss Kyle.
    I'm listening to a song. A rap song of all things. (And I know he loves it.) It makes me miss him. "Send Him Our Love" - Joe Budden
    A well said line..."Can't believe that it's over, but if God called you, I ain't even mad at Him. He must've needed a soldier."

    In His Grip. In His Grip. We love you Kyle. Less than three.

    ______________________________

    As crazy as it sounds, I miss my family. I took so much for granted. I was raised well. I have always looked back and wondered everything about my adoption. But I really shouldn't. I mean, it's something that I'm curious about, and what I would like to know. And which soon enough, I will know. But I shouldn't be sitting around just wishing I knew all the information that I don't know right now. It's not the way to live. I was a gift from my birth parents to my adoptive parents. I'm grateful to be alive right now. My families are gifts from God. And someday, I hope to be at peace with my adoption. But clearly that's not the case right now. Answers are coming!!! I got some balls and went down to the adoption agency to request my birth mom's information. We'll go from there...

    _____________________________

    I miss my brother. He's the best. My hero. No doubt about that. I don't think he realizes how much I love him. How much I talk about him. How much he means to me. We should probably hang out soon. For good sake, him and I get along now. Why not hang out?

    _____________________________

    So that's basically it. Just a little dip into my brain. Enjoy.
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