See that beautiful little girl right there, thats isnella. She is my life, she is why i live now.  I keep going because she needs me, she needs her dad.  No matter what happens to me, no matter how bad my health becomes, no matter how much life decides it wants to screw me, I will keep to my purpose in life.  To make sure she is taken care of.  I had other reasons to live, all of which just up and left, i no longer care if im alone the rest of my life that is second to what is realy important and thats my daughter. 

Dont get me wrong, i would welcome someone loving me with open arms. I would not turn em away, i would not push them away, i would return the love they give me. but its no longer important to me.  Thanks to my diabetes i dont have many more healthy years left so i better get moving and make sure that when i can no longer work because im stuck to a wheelchair in about 15 years, isnella is well taken care of. It does however suck being alone.  something im going to have to accept i guess.

but please my friends dont get me wrong....especialy beth, i still appreciate everything you have done for me....you were a big part of keeping me going in the begining of all this and still are a big part, when i need someone to talk to you are there, you help me, calm me down, put things into perspective for me, with out insulting me, judgeing me, makeing me feel stupid for having emotions, for that i will always be grateful and i will always love you.

Well i think ive said enough for one night.