Thursday, April 10, 2008

  • Ladies, stop squatting!



    I  dread using a public bathroom after an Asian woman.  No matter how grotty or classy the place is, they never fail to leave pee all over the toilet seat.  What’s even worse is when they miss the toilet entirely and spray urine all over the floor.  It’s unbearable to imagine the bottom of my pants or even the sole of my shoes soaking and touching this crap.
     
    Life would be dandy if I jumped on the squatting wagon as well, but I’ve never gotten over my fear of falling into the toilet.  When I was a little girl, I used to be terrified of using my grandparent’s bathroom in rural China.  Their version of a bathroom was really an euphemism for a giant porcelain opening dug into the floor where my little legs could barely stretch across the diameter of the hole. Hence my squatting phobia. 



    Those were the dark ages.  But in the modern era of disposable toilet seat covers and p-mate, these women have brought the barbaric practice of squatting into civilized bathrooms everywhere. 

    I hope they fall into the toilet and trip on their own pee.

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