I purchased a lamp at Bed, Bath, and Beyond on Tuesday evening. I mention the day of the week that way you can compare how much more exciting weekday life in San Francisco is to wherever it is you might be living. Here is what the front of the lamp's box looks like.



I show you that, so that I can show you this. On the side of the box is a list of contents. Imagine how surprised you'd be to find any of the following in the box with the lamp. When is the last time you found an ottoman with your lamp? It might be the only time I could have looked at a lamp box and said "Well, we're not getting this one. It doesn't come with a snack table."



Coldplay's new album = Good.
It isn't the rock revolution that Chris Martin predicted. But the album is excellent. I've listened to it over twenty times since I purchased it last week. It makes up for the sub-par delivery on X&Y. When you listen to the album, you'll realize the difference between Viva la Vida and X&Y is that the band wanted to make Viva la Vida. Whereas they had to do X&Y because of their fame.

A Day in the Lush Life of IT
My new job is good. I am more busy than they had predicted, which that means I get to be impressive by fixing things all day long. A pro of the job is that I get paid to keep up with, explore, and fiddle with technology. A con is that someone asks me a question every fifteen minutes, which means I don't have time to focus for long periods of time.

The company is a very small advertising, branding, and logo design company (less than 30 people), but we do work for some of the largest clients you've heard of. Some of the biggest names of our time. Because of this, everything we do is covered by Non-Disclosure Agreements. For example, the standard contract states that if our company leaks the name of a new company, product, or device, we have to pay between $7 million to $15 million.

Here are perks of the job...

1. A MacBook Pro for designers (or for the IT guy... hehe, lucky me) or a nice Dell for non-designers.
2. There is a liquor cabinet.
3. The refrigerator has a bountiful supply of top notch beer (Heineken, Widmer, Guiness, White-Stripe), wine, and a few bottles of champagne.
4. It is okay to drink beer after about 2 p.m.
5. I drank a margarita in the server room once.
   
6. Around my desk and to the left is a massage chair that one of our clients purchased for us.
7. Around my desk and to the right is a nice quality pool table.
8. Between the massage chair and the pool table are a handful of golf balls and a few putters.
9. If I work late on a weekend, I practice putting clear across the office while I wait for the server to do its stuff. I've not sank an 80-foot putt yet.
   
10. Every six-weeks we have an at-work happy hour, complete with fancy cheeses, lots of wine, and other great assortments.
11. We have a music server.
12. Fresh fruit, vegetables, and a few groceries are delivered one or twice a week.
13. Everyone has to be nice to me, because I make up the entire IT division.
14. Several of my co-workers are from foreign countries and have nice accents to hear.
    

Instead of playing sports in high school, I played academic bowl. Any athlete can get laid after scoring the tie-breaking touchdown in the final seconds of the big homecoming game, but it is far more difficult to "get with a lady" (as they say on the streets) after reciting the periodic table of elements. In fact, I submit it is impossible, because it didn't work for me. And it has never worked for anyone. Look at Alex Trebek. It is obvious that he has never had sex. If he did, it must have been terrible. Only bad sex or joining a local emo band makes a person wake up and think "I'd like to wear an out-dated sports jacked with patches on the elbows." And I don't hear him singing.

The only relation between the previous paragraph and the following paragraphs is that my friend Christina attended a rival school and played on the most dreaded academic bowl team in the region. We grew up in neighboring towns, both learned German from my mom, both studied architecture at OSU, and we have quite a few mutual friends.

Last Thursday she stumbled upon the video of my apartment tour and sent me the message "Are you really in San Francisco? I will be here until September. Give me a call tomorrow at lunch."

Friday afternoon I ate lunch in the park at Levi's plaza (where I work), flipped open my phone, and called Christina. When she answered, I realized I could hear her voice. I turned around, and there, unplanned and fifty feet from me, stood Christina! Turns out she works across the street. We'd been eating lunch in the same miniature sized park all week!

What a small, incredible world this place is.

Tomorrow I'm going to purcahse the new Cold Play album. I'm excited about it, but normally when a band starts to claim that they've "written the greatest song in rock history" it means their ten seconds from a complete meltdown, a month away from staring on "I Love New York," and are already dating an Olsen Twin or two.