Currently Listening The Open Door By Evanescence Call me when you're sober see related

     Looking back over this year I have to admit that just getting through it without a breakdown has been a miracle in itself.  I cannot share all of the details, but it seems that my family has been  through so much turmoil this year.  Not my immediate family, but my brothers and sister and some of my closest friends.

•  I have lost four loved ones in three different car accidents between  July and November, they all died instantly and somewhat tragically. 
• My baby girl that came into our home at eight days old is being moved today to a pre-adoptive home.  This is bitter sweet for me personally.  I felt in my heart early on that we were just holding her for someone else, but my heart became very attatched and now aches a little to see her go.  We will see her often however, because she is going with friends of ours. They are so good to her and love her like their own, but their will be a hole in our home for a time......I also hurt a little as I wonder if she will see this as another loss.  First from her biological mother and now us.  I pray time and love will heal any hurt this has caused her.
• I have seen some of those closest to me struggle in their marriages and relationships.  I have cried for them and prayed for them and just listened to them not knowing what to say except, "hang in there".  I see their strength and believe in them when they may not see it for themselves (I have been blessed when it comes to phenomenal friends and family). 

     The only good thing to come of the struggles we have had this year is that they have caused me to be stretched as a human being, physically, emotionally and spirtually, and I guess as I reflect they have served to bring us closer as well.

     I had a good friend ask me how I was doing after hearing about several of the things we had been  experiencing and I thought for a moment and then replied, "I am just waiting to exhale".