Weblog » Tags » lindsey (all)

  • I feel so alone.

    I can't bring myself to talk to any one about anything.I talked to Matt today for a bit, but not about how I was feeling. He apologized for not messaging back. I didn't make a big deal out of it, because it was during …

  • Thoughts for tomorrow.

    The funeral is tomorrow. It will be a double funeral.I'm going. I'm going to wear my black dress that I wore to Harvey's funeral. I'm going to wear my black shoes I bought for homecoming, I think. I might wear hose. …

  • I can't seem to help anymore.

    I've been very focused on myself lately. I've seen every one pretty much break down over Josh and Thomas, but I've been holding up for some reason. Usually I'm the first one to crack, but Jenna has cried more than I ha…

  • I wonder sometimes.

    Funny how things can change in the mere matter of hours.At about lunchtime, I could have killed Matt.Well, what happened was (in a nutshell) was that he saw the scars on my arm (I guess I'm like destined to wear long sle…

  • Torn and broken.

    Well, at the moment I feel so torn. Torn between total fucking bliss and cutting. Today, I got on the scale. I won't say how much I weigh, because it's still fucking huge but it is below what I've been aiming for, sinc…

  • I'm just going to say this all here.

    Hmm, I'm just going to get this all out.I want to die, tonight has been one of those fucking nights. It's kinda been like, everything has connected and I don't like it one fucking bit. Everything, before it was in a fo…

  • Here goes.

    Well, honestly at this point I guess I'm... over having every one not talk to me. I had a conversation with that about Rebecca, which if any one decides to acknowledge my existence again, I'll want to tell them about. …

  • Apparently she doesn't get it

    Well, my mother totally ruined everything this morning. I woke up feeling okay for once. Then, she and me got in an argument over nothing. I told her I was sick of every one fussing at me. She basically called me a b…

  • Things I've been thinking about lately and how I pissed Sarah off

    Screw Up 1002323510235709324Yeah, well I managed to piss Sarah off earlier. She's going to let this kill her and I'm supposed to sit back and watch. Face it, there isn't a fucking thing I can do and that KILLS me. She…

  • Why can't I fix everything? (tears again)

    God, I hate myself so much right now. I just heard from Rebecca. I hate that I can't fix things for her. I read her message and I cried. Read Lindsey's diary and I cried. I want to fucking fix every one. I hate tha…

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