Weblog » Archives » April 2008
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What would the title of your auto-biography be?
Seriously? It isn't even spelled correctly. I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too! -
Who is your favorite sports star?
Eat me xanga. We are supposed to start IMPROVING the featured questions, now it has come to this. Yes, I blog at xanga, among other places, but this is my favorite. And it pisses me off that we are going above and beyond… -
Define yourself. Kween_of_Queens challenge for this month..........
This may be the hardest writing challenge Ive had since I was told to write out my life's achievments. So hard in fact that I am going to try a list format and see if it doesnt fry out my brain as badly. I am strong. I a… -
The best, and the worst camping trip Ive ever been on.
The wind bit mercilously at the tips of my fingers as I pulled the glove from my hand and tilted my wrist towards the light from the headlamp. It was almost midnight. The cars were parked three miles from where I stoo… -
So Im on myspace right?
To draw traffic here, and i get thisa message with a picture of an unborn fetus.the subject says WHY.I open it, not knowing WTF since I get so many of you freaks emailing me every day anyway, but the message just said WH… -
My Featured Question:
Is it Ethical to use the medical data collected during the holocaust by Nazi doctors to practical use today?recommend this to your friends, because their opinion matters too, right?May I for a moment stand on a soapbox a… -
EDUCATION
Educate yourself. Not everything is as it seems. The world is different, people are different.CNN is bullshit. FOX news is REALLY bullshit. People are dying, and you are worried about getting the new MAC. (which is pathe… -
Women are easy. Trust me, I know.
Women are easy. Its true, there are constants about women that some men dont realize.Having trouble meeting a woman? You may think yo… -
What is home to me?
I have been thinking alot about this question lately, not because it was some run-of-the-mill bullshit featured question forcing me to think and come up with the worlds greatest blog, but instead because of certain thing… -
What would be a legitimate reason to break up with your significant other?
Forgetting to bring home the milk. I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too! -
Why Women ask the questions we ask.
We women are manipulative creatures, thats just the honest to god truth. We ask loaded questions in order to quickly and more accurately gauge the relationship we are in. Its just the way the world works, get over it. I … -
Working 9 to 5, just trying to make a livin.
He hit me, square in the jaw. The force pushed my face sideways and I dropped to my knees and was quickly steeped in the blood pouring from the cut on my upper lip. I looked up, stilleto heels, and a latex skirt that sho… -
What are the three quirky habits you have?
I kiss my fingertips and touch the roof of my car every single time I pass underneath a yellow light. I find this reassuring, and If I dont do it I kind of feel like I have some sort of impending doom for the rest of the… -
This is the problem with alcohol.........
Dear Faceless nameless super hot guy- About a year ago we met in that bar You might remember, the one with the monkey out front. Your brother immediately turned to tongue wrestling with my sister and we divulge… -
I am a complete fucking fraud.
I walk into bars without paying a cover because I have a press pass that is over a year old and valid only to about one person in the world, but people are so stupid, They smile and wave me through the line every single … -
Stabbings with your steak and eggs tonight, sir?
I felt his labored breaths as I held him close to my face. He was weak, bleeding from the stomach and mouthing words my poorly picked up spanish couldn't begin to understand. I pressed the stack of napkins into his wound… -
Blue
You were ice cold that day, your heart and your fingertips a pale blue. I watched the currents of smoke rise around your lips. I tried to read while you finished packing. I stayed there, in our bed until the sun hit t… -
Have you heard about the dangers of using NuvaRing?
Oh my god, its like the worst thing ever. I mean, nuvaring, isnt that something oprah endorses. SERIOUSLY XANGA, Ive got at least six months of bedrest, Id be happy, and willing to be the one to pick out the featured que… -
My Mother
Whom has done some pretty crazy shit in her day actually called in a favor. Some Indian Doctor with a name I couldnt pronounce even if I tried called me late last night from godknowswhere and told me that he was able to … -
I hate the neighbor's children.
I know you shouldn't hate children, but I do, and Im not ashamed to say it. Perhaps I could have left this for the last blog.I Digress, I hate my neighbors children because they are rotten stinking festering brats, who s… -
Things I should be ashamed to admit, but am not.
Idea stolen with permission from my favorite blogger, and resident pool boy Druginducedduck. Go over and see his, he is even more offensive than I am.I have the sex drive of a 19 year old boy and a porn collection to riv… -
If you placed an ad in the personals, what would it read?
Smart, warm, compassionate woman seeking man to fulfill all her desires. He must like to stay at home and clean the house spotless as she goes fishing. He must insist on buying diamonds for every discretion imagineable (… -
Why I am TRUE.
I have gotten so many overwhelming comments regarding my last post, which I understand completely. Some people agree with me, and some people dont. The fault lies in me, and only me. I should have been more forethright i… -
OKAY What the fuck...................
I just got thisHi,Thanks for applying for the Xanga TRUE program. We're excited that so many users want to be a part of TRUE. We wish we could accept everyone that applies but not every user that applies currently … -
The loss of biloxi.
I drove past your fathers house today. That bluff, the one that looks like a giant old mans nose that always marks the turn. Remember that day? I left my outdated wallet and my version of "on the road" lazily in the ba… -
Hello there,
Welcome back. I would like to invite every one to go here to see why a recommendation of my post was retracted. AND, for all of you who wish, if you are able to find one incident of me using the word "fagot" in a derroga… -
Dear xanga, Just kidding!
Dear Xanga, I know I said alot of rude things, especially about your mother, whom I am sure is a totally loveable lady, hence the apology. Anyway, After refraining myself from the constant desire to annoy such xangateam … -
Fifty things.
50 Things About Me Category: Life The Obligatory 50 Things about December. I suppose you are required to write these once you start blogging on xanga, and lets be honest, I love to talk about myself. Plus, I … -
April Fools Day is the worst holiday.
Go and say hello to our friend PurpleRitz Who told me she was dead or dying, or the like as a nasty april fools joke. Ive blocked her, and I encourage anyone else who thinks this was a stupid cruel joke affecting not onl… -
What's something about yourself that you hope will never change?
*shakes head and walks away* I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too! -
Splish, Splash
It was Easter, the summer I turned thirteen. My mother got into her crazy head that a duck would be a fun pet for a thirteen year old girl, and proceeded to get five of them to live in our garden. I named them, Spl… -
Baseball diamonds.
His hands were shaking, but he could unbutton a shirt without stumbling, For that I was grateful. The small patch of dark hair caught my eye and I thought of how it would feel between my fingers. I watched him whil… -
Once upon a time...........
He sleeps soundly, in an unfamiliar apartment I slink from beneath his crushing arm. Stronger than I recall it being the night before, remembering the way he hovered above me, the look of desire in his eyes. The light wo… -
uh
So Im thinking of doing a protected list for those people who want to read my writing, not just my sarcastic rambling. There is a noteable difference in readers depending on the topic. Would you like to be on the sex/wri… -
Weekly Writing Challenge 3. Biloxi continued
He found the cacophony distracting as he walked into the room, the beer, the laughter, the crowd. He didnt notice me at first, But I had never seen a more beautiful site. His hair fell in his face when he walked through … -
What does it take for someone to earn your trust?
A blood sample and a static IP address. I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too! -
DOES ANYONE ELSE FIND THIS COMPLETE BULLSHIT?
First a backstory. Someone is trying to guess my password to my myspace account, which is just about practically impossible, but regardless, this is the email I got from myspace.Hello, In order to verify your identi… -
Drunken stories part 2.
I woke, squinting my eyes in the bright sunlight. It must have been noon, but I heard him cooking in the kitchen already. I stretched knowing that I needed it. I took a deep breath, smelling the bacon and eggs he was coo… -
To the world......
Please, if you have something you want to ask me, just ask me. Leave my poor innocent friends alone. Its really starting to grate on my nerves. And No Eadie, I won't make out with you right now, stop asking. Sheesh. -
Urban Dictionary Definition of Soccer Mom
Are you a soccer Mom?Soccer Mom:What does it mean to be a soccer mom? Materialistic, drama-queen, living off the fat paycheck her mediocre husband pulls in. She works overtime to ensure that her children never have dirt … -
The state of colorado wants to be an english only state.
Colorado Legislature is trying to add to the constitution that you cannot work in this country without speaking fluent english. This is supposed to cut down on illegal immigrants, but of course, like most things, it wont… -
A dissection that never should have happened.
Alright, Im tired of it. Im tired of the stigma, that Waterworld was a crappy movie. Let me set the record straight.Waterworld meets up with a Nomadic Loner named Mariner, it is set in the future when the ice caps melt … -
A mothers love.
The long hours spent rocking quietly, trying intently not to doze off while simultaneously patting the bottom of a tiny baby and singing the freecreditreport.com song. The months of breastfeeding, that not only caused se… -
What does romance mean to you? Are you a romantic person?
Well into rounds of tequila I found the courage to kiss you but only on the cheek. Your reaction, the gut wrenching smile and a raise of those eyebrows. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder they say. They also say whe… -
Biloxi on my mind.
The world started spinning the year that I turned 16, simply in a way that it hadnt before. The sun was brighter, the flowers smelled sweeter, fate was a bit kinder to me than I ever could have hoped. Life doesnt al… -
Warning, Super lame (drunkie december) pictures ahead.
So, Because my friend Kristi is a goddess of epic proportions, she insisted I get off my sick ass and go to Karoake night. This is me, and some drink called a scooby snack, which i totally thought was something else*wink… -
If the money was good enough, would you endorse a product you knew was dangerous?
EVERYBODY has a price, mine happens to be relatively low. I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too! -
A very quick entry re: my father in law.
He has been serving in Iraq for some time now, and was scheduled to leave base the other day. On his way to the gym he was called to cover for one of his enlisted men because they were ill. The gym was bombed half an hou… -
Have you ever been the victim of a bad haircut? Are you willing to share a photo?
When I was fifteen, I went into my bathroom and shaved my head completely. I will find a photo, and I will share it with you. I did it for two reasons. Because my mother told me not to. andBecause my mother told me not t… -
Stop the Drama Xanga, its getting old.
Im tired, but moreso emotionally than physically. I come to xanga each morning to say hello to my friends, to read the words they have written, and perhaps.... if the heavens are aligned just right, I write myself. The m… -
If you had to limit your internet usage to only three websites,what three websites would you choose?
The XangaThesaurus.comWikipedia.comand the fourth runner up"www.killingzombiewhores.com/FAQ I just answered this Featured Question, you can answer it too! -
Weekly Writing Challenge Letter to yourself
Dear Me. I know this letter isnt going to make much sense, just please take my word for it. There are a couple of mistakes you made that I wanted you to avoid, just for the sake of your heart. When your big sisters tell … -
Guest Blogger, Please read and comment.
As many of you know from time to time I will have a subscriber ask if they can be a guest blogger on my site. My subbers give the best critique and can really change the direction of a person's writing (trust me, I know… -
How to say I am sorry.
Marriage is so funny, somedays you can be blissfully happy, and then the very next day its like you are just trying to figure out a way to hide the bodies without the neighbors smelling the decay. Truth is, fighting is … -
Who would be the best actor/actress to play you in a movie about your life?
This featured question makes me feel insecure, but whatever. We are going to answer it anyway!The person I would most love to play ME in a move about ME would be...... Charlize, how we love thee and thine golden locks. P… -
Everything in moderation.
My oldest son, Camen, is struggling to find his identity. Which is kind of interesting, since my "identity" didnt show up until I was 24 or so, and only after much introspection. Camen is so much like his father, sometim… -
How do you resolve disputes with your significant other?
I punch him in the face, and run away. Okay, thats not really the case. My husband and I get into it all the time, which keeps our relationship exciting, and intriguing. Don't tell him, but sometimes I pick fights with h… -
Weekly_Writing_Challenge AIDS.
1999. I'd made my mistakes, I had my share of improper, unlady-like behaviour and I had certainly been to all the wrong places. It felt like a low-speed police chase through the neighborhood of my cerebral cortex. It … -
MLK and NKOTB.
Dear Today Show, Thank you for your chilling account of Martin Luther Kin Jr.'s death, and its accurate display of grief that covered the nation during those dark hours. I admit, growing up in an almost completely white … -
Kids are fun.
Parenting is fun. Don't let anyone tell you any differently. Here are, for lack of any real substance to write about, a bunch of things I never knew about kids, until I had three of them.1. Trying to feed a five month ol… -
How do you feel about the world's obsessions with weight, diet and beauty?
Is it the "World" or is it America, and the Mcdonalds waistline that shows just how fat, lazy, and gluttonous we have all become?Weight, Diet, and Beauty are three very different things. You can have one without the othe… -
How to become a Xangalebrity.
Listen people, it isnt hard to garner popularity when you are in an anonymous forum, but for those of you who wish to know exactly how I got to this imaginary (yet coveted) state called Xangalebrity, I will break it down… -
Ten things I dont understand about men.
Ten Things I dont understand about men. 10. How can men, at the drop of a hat, the drop of a dime, or the drop of a pair of pink panties, be ready for sex. I mean, I have a sex drive like the rest of middle am…
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