sorry i have not been online lately. taking care of my Grandma after her surgery is a lot more demanding and difficult than i had imagined it would be, both physically and emotionally. i probably will not be on much, if at all, until she is able to care for herself again. the estimated recovery time is 2-4 weeks. thanks for all the thoughts and prayers.

i hope all is well with you, my friends. lots of love always.

..................

p.s. here is something to inspire you during my absence.

A MORSEL OF HOPE
by: Steve Goodier

Jean Kerr said, "Hope is the feeling you have, that the feeling you
have, isn't permanent." It is what we have when we know that we WILL
eventually survive the night and bask in sunshine once again. It does
not deny the present darkness, but it reminds us that dawn is coming.

Brigadier General Robinson Risner ("Robbie") spent seven years as a
POW at the "Hanoi Hilton," as prisoners of war called their North Viet
Nam compound. There he discovered the power of hope. He spent four and
a half years of that time in isolation. He endured ten months of total
darkness. Those months were the longest of his life. When they boarded
up his little seven-by-seven foot cell, shutting out the light, he
wondered if he was going to make it. He had already been under intense
physical and mental duress after years of confinement. And now, not a
glimmer of light shone into his cell -- or into his soul.

Robbie spent hours a day exercising and praying. But at times he felt
he could nothing but scream. Not wanting to give his captors the
satisfaction of knowing they'd broken him, he stuffed clothing into
his mouth to muffle the noise as he screamed at the top of his lungs.

One day Robbie got down on the floor and crawled under his bunk. He
located a vent that let in outside air. As he pressed against the
vent, he saw a faint glimmer of light reflected on the inside wall of
the opening. Robbie put his eye next to the cement wall and discovered
a minute crack in the construction. It allowed him to glimpse outside,
but was so small that all he could see was one blade of grass. A
single blade of grass and a faint ray of light. But when he stared at
the sight, he felt a surge of joy, excitement and gratitude like he
hadn't known in years. "It represented life, growth, and freedom," he
later said, "and I knew God had not forgotten me." It was that tiny
glimmer of hope that sustained Robbie through an unbearable ordeal.

I am amazed at the strength of the human spirit. It seems to run
forever on nothing but a morsel of hope. But it still must be fed.

I find myself busy keeping my body going - but I know it is just as
important to feed my spirit. Even if all I have is a morsel of hope,
for today that just may be enough.


Now you can add your own comments to Life Support.
http://stevegoodier .blogspot. com/

i loved this story i recieved through email and had to share it with you. i hope it touches your heart as it did mine.

*A BOUQUET OF THORNS*

author unknown

Sandra felt as low as the heels of her shoes when she pulled open the florist shop door, against a November gust of wind. Her life had been as sweet as a spring breeze and then, in the fourth month of her second pregnancy, a 'minor' automobile accident stole her joy. This was Thanksgiving week and the time she should have delivered their infant son.  She grieved over their loss. Troubles had multiplied. Her husband's company 'threatened' to transfer his job to a new location. Her sister had called to say that she could not come for her long awaited holiday visit. What's worse, Sandra's friend suggested that Sandra's grief was a God-given path to maturity that would allow her to empathize with others who suffer. 'She has no idea what I'm feeling,' thought Sandra with a shudder. 'Thanksgiving? Thankful for what?' she wondered. 'For a careless driver whose truck was hardly scratched when he rear-ended her? For an airbag that saved her life, but took her child's?'

'Good afternoon, can I help you?' Sandra was startled by the approach of the shop clerk. 'I . . . I need an arrangement,' stammered Sandra.

' For Thanksgiving? I'm convinced that flowers tell stories,' she continued. 'Are you looking for something that conveys 'gratitude' this Thanksgiving?' 'Not exactly!' Sandra blurted out. 'In the last five months, everything that could go wrong has gone wrong.'

Sandra regretted her outburst, and was surprised when the clerk said, 'I have the perfect arrangement for you.' Then the bell on the door rang, and the clerk greeted the new customer, 'Hi, Barbara, let me get your order.' She excused herself and walked back to a small workroom, then quickly reappeared, carrying an arrangement of greenery, bows, and what appeared to be long-stemmed thorny roses. Except the ends of the rose stems were neatly snipped; there were no flowers. 'Do you want these in a box?' asked the clerk. Sandra watched - was this a joke? Who would want rose stems with no flowers!

She waited for laughter, but neither woman laughed. 'Yes, please,' Barbara replied with an appreciative smile. 'You'd think after three years of getting the special, I wouldn't be so moved by its significance, but I can feel it right here, all over again,' she said, as she gently tapped her chest.

Sandra stammered, 'Ah, that lady just left with . . . uh . . . she left with no flowers!' 'That's right,' said the clerk. 'I cut off the flowers. That's the 'Special'. I call it the Thanksgiving Thorns Bouquet. Barbara came into the shop three years ago, feeling much as you do today,' explained the clerk. 'She thought she had very little to be thankful for. She had just lost her father to cancer; the family business was failing; her son had gotten into drugs; and she was facing major surgery. That same year I had lost my husband,' continued the clerk. 'For the first time in my life, I had to spend the holidays alone. I had no children, no husband, no family nearby, and too much debt to allow any travel.'

'So what did you do?' asked Sandra.

'I learned to be thankful for thorns,' answered the clerk quietly. 'I've always thanked God for the good things in my life and I never questioned Him why those good things happened to me, but when the bad stuff hit, I cried out, 'Why? Why me?!' It took time for me to learn that the dark times are important to our faith! I have always enjoyed the 'flowers' of my life, but it took the thorns to show me the beauty of God's comfort! You know, the Bible says that God comforts us when we're afflicted, and from His consolation we learn to comfort others.'

 Sandra sucked in her breath, as she thought about what her friend had tried to tell her. 'I guess the truth is I don't want comfort. I've lost a baby and I'm angry with God.'

 Just then someone! else walked in the shop. 'Hey, Phil!' the clerk greeted the balding, rotund man. 'My wife sent me in to get our usual Thanksgiving arrangement . twelve thorny, long-stemmed stems!' laughed Phil as the clerk handed him a tissue wrapped arrangement from the refrigerator.

'Those are for your wife?' asked Sandra incredulously. 'Do you mind telling me why she wants a bouquet that looks like that?'

'Four years ago, my wife and I nearly divorced,' Phil replied. 'After forty years, we were in a real mess, but with the Lord's grace and guidance, we trudged through problem after problem, the Lord rescued our marriage. Jenny here (the clerk) told me she kept a vase of rose stems to remind her of what she had learned from 'thorny' times. That was good enough for me. I took home some of those stems. My wife and I decided to label each one for a specific 'problem' and give thanks for what that problem taught us.'

As Phil paid the clerk, he said to Sandra, 'I highly recommend the Special!' 'I don't know if I can be thankful for the thorns in my life' Sandra said to the clerk. 'It's all too . . . fresh.'

'Well,' the clerk replied carefully, 'my experience has shown me that the thorns make the roses more precious. We treasure God's providential care more during trouble than at any other time. Remember that it was a crown of thorns that Jesus wore so we might know His love. Don't resent the thorns.'

Tears rolled down Sandra's cheeks. For the first time since the accident, she loosened her grip on her resentment. I'll take those twelve long-stemmed thorns, please,' she managed to choke out.

'I hoped you would,' said the clerk gently. 'I'll have them ready in a minute.'

'Thank you. What do I owe you?'

'Nothing. Nothing but a promise to allow God to heal your heart. The first year's arrangement is always on me.'

The clerk smiled and handed a card to Sandra. 'I'll attach this card to your arrangement, but maybe you would like to read it first'  It read: 'My God, I have never thanked You for my thorns. I have thanked You a thousand times for my roses, but never once for my thorns. Teach me the glory of the cross I bear; teach me the value of my thorns. Show me that I have climbed closer to You along the path of pain. Show me that, through my tears, the colors of Your rainbow look much more brilliant.'

Praise Him for the roses; thank Him for the thorns.

God Bless all of you.

i got tired of waiting for comments on the other one before posting this one, so here it is. if you still want to read the other one, it's still there. all you have to do is scroll down.

i'm just going to go off of my notes for these in an attempt to make the post easier to read.

Message 3:

[this was one of the lessons that really hit home for me, personally.]

Consecrated Eyes

How Do We Lose Sight of Jesus?

1. False Expectations- when we assume the way something is going to go, and then it doesn't go our way, we begin to doubt that God has the best in store for us. But His best is so much more than anything we could ever imagine, dream of, or hope for.

2. Refusal of Sacrifice and Obedience- when we refuse to obey God's word and sacrifice our own agendas in order to serve Him. We must die to the love of self in order to embrace new life in Christ.

3. Devaluing- when we fail to recognize or accept the things that God values, and/or place our personal values above God's. God's system of value is perfect. That's why it is the same today as it was 2,000 years ago.

4. Misplaced Determination- being determined to have our own needs met in our own timing instead of waiting on God. God will provide for all of our needs in His own time. By depending on ourselves or others to meet our needs, we are setting ourselves up for disappointment.

5. Fantasy- holding onto the false belief that people, events, or objects can fulfill our deepest need. (i.e. "i'll only be able to be happy if _____." thinking.) The truth is, there is a God-shaped hole in all of us that only He can fill.

I. How Do We Defeat Fantasy?

a. Be willing to live in each moment with Jesus, even when that moment is painful. Trust Jesus to see you through.

b. Surrender your thought-life to Christ.

c. Realize that there is more to life than emotions. Jesus did not feel like dying on the cross. His anguished prayers prove this.

Luke 22:41-44 (NIV)

41He withdrew about a stone's throw beyond them, knelt down and prayed, 42"Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done." 43An angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him. 44And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.

How Do We Keep Our Eyes on Jesus?

1. Vulnerability and Humility- we must be willing to open our hearts, become vulnerable and willing to serve, and trust God for His protection.

2. Service- we must be good servants to both God and mankind.

3. Purity- we must be washed in the cleansing Blood of the Lamb--Jesus.

4. Balance- we must embrace the shades of gray in life, not focus on extreme black and whites. We must seek to attain spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical balance.

5. Love- love God and mankind with the Agape love of Jesus. (more on Agape in next lesson.)

II. What Did Jesus' Love Look Like?

a. Glorified the Father (God)

b. Self-sacrificial

c. Followed God's Will (even despite fear and other emotions)

Message 4:

Consecrated Hearts

Restoration of a Broken/Cynical/Cold/Lost Heart

(Read John 21)

1. After Jesus was crucified, Peter didn't know how to live the new life he had found with Jesus, so he returned to his old ways. Peter went back to fishing, because that's what he did before he met Jesus. But Jesus asked him, "Do you love me more than these?" meaning, "Do you love me more than your old ways of doing things?" (v.15) Jesus was giving Peter an opportunity to see that he had a mission, a calling from Jesus to complete, and he could not simply return to his old ways. He must focus on his new life as Jesus' friend and follower.

2. In verses 15-17, Jesus does two things:

a. He gave Peter an assignment. He knew that Peter was unsure of how to continue serving Jesus now that Jesus had been crucified and risen and was going back to the Father. Peter was uncertain also because of his denials of Jesus (see point b). He was unsure of the next step to take, and most likely, he wasn't sure if he was still wanted as a servant of God. But Jesus re-commissioned him to indicate that Peter was still a part of Jesus' ministry.

b. He offered Peter three points of confession as recompense and atonement for his three denials (see John 18:15-17, 25-26). When Jesus asks Peter "Do you love me?" the first two times he uses the Greek word "Agape," which is love that is not based on emotions. It is the purest and truest form of love. It is unconditional. Agape means loving by word and deed, not just when you feel like it, but always. When Peter responded, "You know that I love you," he used the Greek word "Phileo," which is a friendly or brotherly type of love. It is based on emotions, and is conditional upon them. Peter knew he had betrayed Jesus by his denials, and he was being honest with Him. Peter could not profess a love he knew was not there. The reason Peter could not Agape Jesus is because Agape only comes from Jesus through the Holy Spirit, which had not yet been sent to the earth since Jesus has not yet returned to the Father. So the third time, Jesus asked Peter, “Do you love me?” He used the word Phileo, and Peter responded affirmatively, but was upset that Jesus had asked him this question because Peter had already answered that he did twice, and he did not see the connection between his three denials and these three affirmations. Jesus also gave Peter a promise in verse 18 that he would one day love Jesus with Agape love. He told Peter that one day, he would go so far as to give up his own life (in the sense of both living and dying) to glorify God.

The interesting thing about these two things is that one begets the other. If you Agape God, you will do His will. But you will need Agape love in your heart to accomplish His assignments for you.

Closing Points:

*You have to take ownership for your own life and focus on your own walk instead of judging/questioning another's walk. (see John 21:20-22) When Jesus says, "What is it to you?...Follow Me!" He was basically telling Peter that it was not of importance to his own walk what Jesus commanded of the other disciple. Peter's only concern was to be Peter's walk, not everyone else's. We are to follow Jesus regardless of what others are (or are not) doing.

*Consecrated Character means forming new, Godly habits to replace the old, sinful ones.

*There will be struggles, trouble, obstacles, and attacks. (John 16:33 "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.") Don't fall into false expectations that once you decide to change your life and follow Jesus that everything will be easy-breezy. There will be trouble, but Jesus will help you through it if you ask and allow Him to.

*When you are delivered, it is an "already, not yet" situation. You have been delivered from the heart of sin, but your nature is still in the habit of sinning. You have to accept God's grace and continue to walk out your deliverance by faith even when it's difficult and you've faltered.

*Don't be discouraged. (1 Chronicles 28:20 "Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the LORD God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you until all the work for the service of the temple of the LORD is finished.") Don't let life (or your own human nature) get you down. When you fail, ask God to forgive and to strengthen you in that area of weakness. Little by Little, you will learn to recognize and stop the old, sinful habits in their tracks, and eventually they may not even be an issue anymore.

*You have to pray every morning for God to be your source of Agape love, and ask Him to show you practical ways to live a life of Agape towards Him and others. Agape love comes through obedience. As you choose to love God and others by faith and out of obedience to the commandments of God, His Agape love will be poured out on and through you. You will never be empty (feel like you have nothing left to give) if you continue to seek God as your source of love.

well, that's it. i hope someone can benefit from these notes the way i have.

(Agape)love and peace, Jen