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bombbon
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Name: Born - a - bon
Gender: Female
Interests: God, Cross-country, Worship, Walks/Wandering, Black and White Pictures, Eating, Ignyte@Adam, Friends, Loved Ones, Words, Current affairs, Historical places
Expertise: Eating,Eating & Eating
Industry: For God
Message: message me
Member Since:
8/17/2007
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| GoodbyeWell here is the end of another chapter
No more xanga, no more blogging in general.
Through the fire, I have discovered writing, words, paper, real journals.
As much as I would love to share my unending list of wants, raves, rants, homework, school life, church life, sadness, happiness, etc, you get the drift..I've realised that more often than not, the things that need to be heard or that I want to be heard stay within my heart.
Late nights, I wish I had more time. I wish I could tell you all the things in my heart that I locked away. All of the yous I have.
Jesus is good and I hope one day you find Him the way I did. Though your circumstances may not change, but things will happen. That you'd be surprised what lugging yourself out of pity parties can do. Believe me, I know. Give it a shot?
So the posts will stay here (hopefully encapsulated in time and not erased by xanga due to inactivity? do they even do that?) for memories sake.
xoxo,
Gossip girl.
HAHAHAHAH
that was so gay, but that's what happens when you spend to much time on youtube. HAHAHA
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| Belief"When they hear the word believe, some people associate it with an emotion. But while belief can carry emotions with it, it's more than a feeling. Belief is a decision, an act of the will. Belief is persevering and following God's plan even when our minds lack understanding. Belief goes beyond understanding. It's following the conviction of your heart, even when your mind is lagging behind, or arguing with itself."
-(Pg 43, Decide To Believe) Battle of the Mind By Joyce Meyer
Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
-Galatians 6:9
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| Be Proactive"Right now it's just about choosing to worship all the time... I don't always feel like it, sometimes I don't feel like singing to God. But I know that my circumstances in this season doesn't change that God is still God. It doesn't change what God's called me to be here, what He's called me to do... He's still bigger than everything I'm facing."http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZE33ejdgWIYI'm so tired of all the expectations that people place upon me. The things that people want for me. I know they mean well, I know they really care. But sometimes...I just want to be Benavon? I want people to know what's important to me and what's not. Not what they think is important to me, not what they think I want, but what I think. I'm so tired. As much as I try to pretend that I'm not, and to busy myself with busyness.. I know. that the insecurity is so deep and that's the only reason why I'm studying so hard, because I don't know what else to do. "When I'm in the fire and when I'm being refined and when I'm in the battle and the triumph isn't here yet but it's coming. You look at God and say this is who you are. He does get bigger in your life and it takes away the things in your life that are so shattered and it makes him the focus as it begins to put those things back together"I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain. I will rejoice I will declareGod is my victory and He is hereThis is my prayer in the harvestIn favour and provenance flowI know I"m filled to be emptied againThis seed I receive I will sow
Victory at hand.
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| Photo JournalRandom:
(Pictures taken some time ago, that I have just uploaded)
In this picture, I look super, super, super super a lot like Mel Khor.. I think it's the hair
Thursday - Bio Heart dissection (I'll spare you the heart)
Saturday- Hwa Chong Invitationals (was short lived)/ Service/ Dinner at Mad Jacks
Encountering God.. was tiring.
I didn't want to respond. My heart was hard. I rush into service after HC Invitationals (which we sadly screwed up), made it in time for announcements. Once communion started I could sense it. Actually I could sense it yesterday but I pretended that I didn't feel anything. Once raine changed song to ... I can't remember what it was, but I know that I'd been singing it all week during attempts at tawg.
I tried very, very, very hard not to cry during sermon.
Once the prayer before alter call started I was crying. Immobilised, I sat.. I tried very hard to stop crying. God's voice calming me.. telling me that He was always there. Small truths that I always forgotten were reminded. Extended alter call, ariel came by, I cried even more. (Thank you best friend)
God doesn't let me go.
And although it's so tiring to have to go home and immediately face the reality of it, Jesus is still the same. It's hard to hang on, but I won't let go.
Sunday- Fang's Birthday Lunch at Gastronomia (Lovely scones)
Monday - MGPB Prefects Installation 2008-2009
(Aside from the fact that my not one of my parents came, it was pretty darn good)
Spot the Ferragamos
Congrats: CC 2008-2009. We did it, we're here now. It's scary, but so uber exciting. In such a short time, I have built up a really strong love for the CC, the trust that we have, along with all our jokes. It's going to be exciting, exciting.
PB: Janine, Hannah, Choeeeees, Wanns, Crystal, etc, etc
TIES TIES TIES. heh heh heh, seeing you all in ties is interesting (:
School school school.
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| You're All I NeedSometimes I'm so tired of people asking me if I'm sure, if I'm not making an emotionally rash decision, for giving me that "are you absurd?" tone of voice/facial expression when I say it.
Of course I know that the implications are huge.
I wonder if they can tell that my heart breaks when they say it. I wonder if they can see in my eyes how much it hurts me, but yet I still do it. Simply because I love God more.
I'm not noble, I think I'm a coward.
Never been more broken, never had God's hands closer to me.
Today what emma said to me really, really, really encouraged me.
When I say the situation in a normal person worldly perspective, she says what everyone else would say. When I start going on about how God said this, and how though it hurts, God has never been closer. And she says simply, " Then just do it. Just follow God wholeheartedly because that's what He's calling you to do"
And many, many hugs. We'll have lunch soon Emmmms.
It's been a long week. 18 hour days, 12 hours spent in school on average. Back to back tests. God thanks for bringing me through. All spent and tired, I worship, worship. In the quiet and stillness last a night, I begin to sing Healer, and I know deep down, God is my healer.
No matter how much it hurts, it'll be okay. Choe, becs and soul cat/bar girl abi (HAHAHAHA) we must jam sooooon. And I will try to bring my own guitar so that we I will avoid any further so-into-it guitar jamming that I break the strings(again). I'll try to get a pedal.
Tomorrow is finalsssssss. Let's hope we kick butt!
Jesus You're All I Need.
This is the one about whom it is written:
" 'I will send my messenger ahead of you,
who will prepare your way before you.' I
tell you the truth: Among those born of women there has not risen
anyone greater than John the Baptist; yet he who is least in the
kingdom of heaven is greater than he. From
the days of John the Baptist until now, the kingdom of heaven has been
forcefully advancing, and forceful men lay hold of it.
Matthew 11:10-12
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