:: I think that Aubrey is turning out to be quite the silly girl. She already cracks up about the ridiculous games she and Daddy play together. Daniel seems pretty pleased that she's showing distinct signs of being a girl after his own heart in the humor department.

:: Boys and girls are so incredibly different! I never have to tell Bronwyn that she's not allowed to spit in the house. On the other hand, I never have to tell the boys that they need to stop crying about not wearing a dress today.

:: Tomorrow Gabriel has his first morning of Friday Program. I'm a little overwhelmed by the idea of not having him here for a whole morning each week (he does so much to help me these days!). I'm even more overwhelmed by how much I'm already missing "those days" as a mom. You know... when the little ones are all right here and I am their entire world. Gabriel will be going off on his own a bit, making friends and learning things apart from me. I've been excited for him as we've looked ahead to this, but today I'm just sad for me. And I guess I didn't anticipate dealing with these sorts of feelings for, like, another 10 years or something.

:: Jackson not only looks like a Sinclair with his bright red hair, droopy eyes and white eyelashes, and peaches n' cream complexion, but he does a number of things that remind me of my dad. Like the way he eats. So slow! The rest of us will have long emptied our plates, and still Jackson is quietly eating while we look on. He definitely didn't get that from Daniel or I.

:: Bronwyn keeps getting taller and taller. Somebody make her stop before I cry.

:: Gabriel still says Calithornia instead of California. Bronwyn still says lellow instead of yellow. Jackson still says biaper instead of diaper. The only time Aubrey talks is in the middle of the night when she stands in her crib and cries, "Mama! Mama! Mama!" And, yes, I think it's all incredibly cute.

We've had some really beautiful fall days. I think this autumn is the kind of autumn that we remember for years. The trees are unbelievable. The leaves crunch underground as you walk down the sidewalk. The sky is either blue or gray, but never rainy. The air is crisp while the sun is warm.

Perfect.

You'd think with such lovely fall weather that I'd be fully inspired for fall. I guess I've been pretty tired because I can't seem to muster myself up for much beyond the necessities: laundry, cooking, cleaning, schooling, training. Add to that regular strolls through the town with the kids and the necessary errands that seem to come up all the time, and I'm DONE. No pumpkin bread here. Not even an apple crisp. No raking of leaves, no cutting down of gardens for the winter.

Next week, I tell myself when I think of all the things I should be doing.

This week Gabriel starts Friday Program. He is mostly excited, if a little apprehensive. I can't believe this is starting. Is it OK if I kind of wish it wasn't? Can't we just go back to the toddler years? Forget about science fairs and choir performances and uniforms and textbooks? He's growing up and I think I'm just not ready. Not today anyway.

Next week, maybe.

I keep having to make decisions about our project. On the one hand, this is exactly my dream come true. I don't want ugly faux wood laminate countertops any more! I am so excited for tons more cupboard space and a family room. But, really, I have to pick out new stuff? And while I'm excited about the visions I have in my mind for the new space, I am also pretty overwhelmed at the idea of having to put it all together. I mean, seriously, can't general contractors make the curtains, too???

The dishwasher and microwave have to be purchased. We plan on waiting to get the new refrigerator and range next spring. There are more important things to take care of at present, like the heating system in our house. Which reminds me, we have to figure out when we're going to tackle some of that.

Next week.