Currently Playing Garden State By Various Artists see related

<i>don't want you thinking i'm unhappy, what is closer to the truth, if i lived til i was 102, i just don't think i'll ever get over you</i>

i feel like watching garden state and reminiscing.

damn this unmotivation. i hate it when i do this. sit very very still and maybe i won't have to think about anything....

i went to denny's last night with blake, jenna, jen and roanna. it was fun. kinda like old times. except without bird. blake and jenna got me a poleroid camera. i am so excited to use it! i am sorely going to miss them all. and i'm anticipating the fact that i am going to bawl like a baby when its time.

i'm sorry that i have very little else to talk about lately. but thats whats going on right now.

the relief in all this madness is that i know for certain that i'm doing god's will. and everything that happens in the next 3 months is going to change my life. cheesy as that expression is.

its so weird how fast time can fly by and how quickly relationships can evolve and change. and how fast we can change. but how slowly we think we're growing.

but i am sad. eccstatic in that sadness. but sad still. that i will miss campouts, staying at jen's house for 4 days in a row, playing halo until the wee hours of the morning, existing together and doing nothing. slurpees. round brownie. disneyland.

but don't bother commenting and saying "but youre gonna have so much fun blah blah blah" cuz i know. but i'm still sad. and thats okay too.

last summer was magic. lol. i know that sounds dumb. but i think maybe it was the last summer of irresponsibility and adolecense. and this one is the first of independence and growing up. change never came easily to me. but its god's will. so it can't be bad. just different.

but i expect you all to write me emails or letters. i'll let you know when i get my address what it is so you can write me.

anyway. i should start cleaning and whatnot.......i've wasted the whole day. crap.

~rachel~