| | can't get enough of those magnetic fields. mmm mmm. (blog to follow afterwards)
Don't fall in love with me yet
We only recently met
True I'm in love with you but
you might decide I'm a nut
Give me a week or two to
go absolutley cuckoo
then, when you see your error,
then, you can flee in terror
like everybody else does
I only tell you this cause
I'm easy to get rid of
but not if you fall in love
Know now that I'm on the make
and if you make a mistake
my heart will certainly break
I'll have to jump in a lake
and all my friends will blame you
There's no telling what they'll do
It's only fair to tell you
I'm absolutely cuckoo
-----------------------------------
sorry. i feel a bit crazy, myself. i kinda feel like i'm at the tip of
a knife and just waiting for the inevitable fall or cut or slice or
whatever is bound to go wrong.
i need a good book to read to make sense of life.
lots of little things are failing me and i'm grasping at straws to put
things right and probably giving myself a stress-related ulcer in the
process. but thats the funny thing. i'm not "stressed" necessarily
insomuch as i have anxiety over the outcome of all the little problems
i've lined up to solve.
why am i always solving things? why do they never just solve themselves?
i am probably the last director to get the schedules in because i'm
waiting on one flipping actor to give me his availability...so i'm
dreading class tomorrow when i should have had all that sorted out but
alas, things never just happen right, i have to make them.
i almost want to just forget about directing until my head and creative
juices are in the right place. but that could be never, or tomorrow,
and thats the problem with creativity. its more elusive than a stealthy
ninja...
and i'm always trying to catch the bastard. always just out of reach
and i try to trap him in words, in paint, in sharpie, in pen. sometimes
i think i've got him and i made something truly remarkable until the
next day when i find he jumped out of the art and ran away leaving it
trite and banal. a cliché mess of kitch imagination.
anyway...
i can play "aeroplane over the sea" by neutral milk hotel on the guitar now. i'm learning faster than i thought i would.
just in case you missed it, it is HOT outside. or well, it was. yuck.
80 degrees should just never happen. ever. gimme 60 degrees with a 40%
chance of rain and i'm good to go.
perhaps i should look into moving to nova scotia.
~rachel~ |
| | Posted 5/2/2006 3:14 AM - 1 view - 0 comments
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