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crying_ashes
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Name: Sarah
Country: United States
State: Kansas
Metro: Wichita
Birthday: 5/13/1989
Gender: Female
Interests: I'm the cancer, the light in your way. I will admit there is nothing stunning enough about me for you to acquire in your search for perfection. I am the embodiment of this humanity. Look. Don't touch.
Expertise: Wanting to be happy. But it's hard, since I feel the need to be happier than other people - and I always think them happier than they are.
Occupation: Student
Industry: Art
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
5/30/2004
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| well i ruined it lol. i have a new xanga, but i forgot i was on it and
posted everywhere. so whatever lol. my new xanga is Romancing_the_Dead.
i'm gonna post stuff on it, but if you would, lets all just be nice to
each other and stop using such a retarded thing to get back at each
other, or pretend we're smarter than anyone else. so anyway. you can
read my other one if you want, but if you start being mean or
whatever... just don't even try to post lol.
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| Sorrow for a Diadem
Your hair is red, your lips are green,
You know what’s sure to make me scream.
My eyes are tired, my shirt is torn,
I’d love to kill you before you’re born.
You make believe I’m someone else,
A beautiful face on a pretty shelf.
With your kisses sweet and eyes complete,
You match your gown with villainy.
Just wait until the milk turns sour,
You’ll send me packing within the hour.
I’m tired of the weight upon my shoulders.
It’s been too long and we’re getting older.
I’ll kiss you and sing you to sleep,
When I’m gone, love, promise not to weep.
I know you must love me dear,
I’ve stuck around a couple years,
If you didn’t I’d be dead…
But I am dead and you are dead,
And we like spinning in fast paced circles
Round your other lover’s grave.
My shirt mended, perfectly clean,
Buttoned so tight that I can’t dream.
My hips, too high, my knees too low,
To match your rhythm flow for flow.
If you will be my (she was your) one and only,
Then we both won’t be so lonely.
Just waiting for our hair to dry,
And trying, hardly, not to cry.
Just wishing we had half the time,
To sit around and watch the flowers die.
Sadly there’s nothing else to do,
But cut my tongue in two.
And I would love you but I love myself.
I would kill to be someone else.
I know you must love me
dear,
I’ve stuck around for a couple years,
If you didn’t I’d be dead…
But I am dead and you are dead,
And we like spinning in fast paced circles
Round your other lover’s grave.
(But she's dead, won't you just leave her alone?)
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| well maybe i won't leave. at least not until i can make the other xanga look decent. it looks dumb now.
thy bruise is incurable, and
thy wound is grievous. There is none to plead thy cause, that thou
mayest be bound up: thou hast no healing medicines. All thy
lovers have forgotten
thee; they seek thee not; for I have wounded thee with the wound of an
enemy, with the chastisement of a cruel one, for the multitude of thine
iniquity; because thy sins were increased. Why criest thou for thine
affliction? thy sorrow is incurable for the multitude of thine
iniquity: because thy sins were increased, I have done these things
unto thee. Therefore all they that
devour thee shall be devoured; and all thine adversaries, every one of
them, shall go into captivity; and they that spoil thee shall be a
spoil, and all that prey upon thee will I give for a prey. For I will
restore health
unto thee, and I will heal thee of thy wounds; because
they called thee an Outcast, saying, this no man seeketh
after. I will cause him to draw near, and he shall approach unto me:
for
who is this that engaged his heart to approach unto me? And ye shall be
my people, and I will be your God
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| i lied. here's my last and final post.
Matthew 12:34-37
34 O generation of vipers, how can ye, being evil, speak good things? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh.35 A good man out of the good
treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out
of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things.36 But I say unto you, that every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment.37 For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned.
Main Entry: 1lyr·ic
Pronunciation: 'lir-ik
Function: noun
the words of a song -- often used in plural
yup. :) so. let's take a vote? who doesn't like me now? lol
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| WARNING! CONENT MAY OFFEND OR UPSET. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.
i have now decided that this xanga will no longer be used. i'm going to
make a new one, just for me to post my poetry in and other personal
things i don't want the entire world and such people reading. i will
make a private post for those of you that i am going to allow to see my
other xanga.
i'm sick of this. oh and btw... has anyone ever heard of the
concept of telling you something important to your face? lol obviously
not. and i mean lol in an ironic not funny way.i need to get over it
right? well obviously you don't know me very
well, even after our last ordeal. i'm sorry i offend people all the
time. i don't know what it is about me, but no matter what i say, i
offend people. so i'll just stop talking to you. i'm sorry. i don't
know what else i can say, but i'm sorry seems like the only words that
ever come out of my mouth, that or "negative" ones that prove that i'm
still an immature little girl who just goes out of her way to make
everyone unhappy. maybe you think i'm throwing a temper tantrum or a
pity
party. perhaps. but i don't particularly care right now.
anway
so here's my last post. ready for it?
the past month has been a month of crap (yes, i am still going to use
the word crap. so fuck off. wow that was liberating.) chris has
wrecked our car twice. this time he hit a parked vehicle and
didn't feel the need to call the cops, probably because he was drunk
and scared. he swerved to miss our cat. so now we get to pay a 500
dollar deductable to cover the cost of fixing our car, and on top of
that we get to pay about 400 dollars for the rental car. this sucks. we
really don't have 900 dollars, and all chris can afford to help us with
is about 300. my dad is stressed, my mom was so upset this morning that
she started crying, oh and my parents are fighting cause chris told my
mom he wasn't drinking and she believes him and my dad doesn't, and i
was tramutized because when the cop showed up at our house i thought he
was there to tell me chris died in a car accident. and lukas just
generally is acting insane, which makes everyone yella thim, to try and
make everyone feel better because everyone is so upset. oh, and
tomorrow my cousins are coming back over, to eat our food because they
don't have any money. that is of course if ben isn't arrested today,
because he owes a lot of money for child support because he's been out
of work here for so long and they told him if he doesn't get a job by
today he's going to jail. so who even knows what's gonna happen there.
and as for me? this past week has been the most stressful of my life
and i wish i had no friends, because either you're there and don't
care, or you're not there because you can't be obviously. and i'm just
tired of it. i'd feel a lot better if people would just leave me alone,
some of you anyway.
so i suck. i try to be a good christian but i guess it doesn't work.
i'm sorry none of you think i'm good enough. but Jesus does. Jesus
thinks i'm good enough, so screw the rest of you. i'm not supposed to
care what you think anyway. but i do care, i care way too much and then
i'm screwed because not a lot of people seem to care about that, or
even try to get it at all.
"so i'm sorry i'm not good enough"
-the story of my life
and that my dear friends,
is the end.
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