He has a type of arthritis that affects the immune system. He couldn't eat, couldn't play, couldn't move his hands or legs or go to school for awhile there. His little hands were so swollen and crippled. He didn't have the energy to raise his head and eat, and when he tried, he couldn't even hold the spoon. He was literally wasting away.  It was so heartbreaking that I even made myself sick over it.

This was the same child that my sister had wished would die, and it seemed for awhile that her wish was going to be granted. The doctor's even said that there was no way that he would survive it, yet he did. I still believe that it was because of all the prayers.......from all different religions....from pagans.....christians......and even from those that didn't know about prayer but just sent their well wishes his way....their energy. He went into remission. He started to eat slowly but surely and has gained some weight. He plays baseball. And he laughs....no matter how bad it got, this little boy always had a smile for his aunt. When he could barely lift his head, he would lay his head on the table and smile at me.  He was probably just laughing at my funny face but it was the most beautiful thing you'd ever see. He's got more guts than I could ever have. More than anyone I've ever seen.

 Still he was in a bad situation, living with my sister. (Have you ever known a mother that hated her own child so much that she wished him dead and told him so? Beat him? Told him she hated the sight of him? Worse. )  Well, Andy is  with April now. (his oldest sister) She was his real mother. She raised him when my sister wouldn't, took care of him since he was a baby, and I think she actually feels like he's her child and not her brother.   Tomorrow, when Doug gets off, we are going to go and check up on them, see how they're doing. I'll let you guys know how he's doing when I get back. From what I know so far though, he's still in remission and doing a lot better.

But my mom told me that their finances aren't so great and that April admitted to going hungry....again. Admitted that if she ate enough to fill her up that it wouldn't leave enough for the rest of the week, and she's out of money. This 19 year old would starve before she'd let her brother go without. Now is that a mom or a sister? Definitely not my sister. (the bitch) She won't help them. Of course, some might say that it was because they took Andy away from her, but that's not it. She has never helped anybody but herself. You know how mothers explain to their little ones about the stork? Well, I think the devil left her on our doorstep.

Maybe I'm too harsh. Maybe the doctors are right and she's sick...bipolar, whatever, but we all have problems, don't we? I tend to be an unforgiving sort, and that includes with my sister. If it's something you're going to have to say "I'm sorry" for, then why the hell do it in the first place? Regardless, she never says it.

 I'm not much on second chances.  I don't ask for second chances for myself. I live my life the way I feel it should be. Second chances are for children. It's the way they learn things. Adults should know better and if they do it anyway, then there's consequences. And I'm a bitch about them, but I gave way too many when I was younger. It made me harder...tougher. Because anyone that asks for seconds, usually ends up asking for thirds. It doesn't happen....ever....not with me. And if it does, then you can bet your ass that the person getting the chance is my son or daughter. Or my nieces or nephews.

 
The saddest thing is that if tomorrow, my sister was cured, and started being the best person in the world, I couldn't find any place for her in my heart......not ever. She stopped being my baby sister a long time ago. I don't have any more tears left for her. I can't help hating her. At one time, I even wished her dead. And now......it doesn't matter to me one way or the other.
If I'm an unfeeling bitch for that.....oh well....shit happens.

Anyway, we are going to be gone tomorrow and depending on the circumstances, maybe Monday too. You weekend is almost over and ours is just starting. I'm not sure if you'll hear from me at all until Tuesday evening.

Oh, and one last thing.....my sister has threatened to stop paying Andy's medical insurance. She says he's no longer her responsibility. If anyone here knows the devil personally, would you ask him to get her place in hell ready. Tell him that she just might be coming home early.