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| | WE LOST HIM LAST NIGHT...
 MONTECITO, CA - I got a text message from Calvin Hayes last night here in Santa Barbara. Monte passed at 8:30pm. When I last heard of his condition through Clay and Jeff when we all were in Vegas together a few days ago, they said he was sleeping 18hrs/day but comfortably.
I've never known a wedding photography world without Monte Zucker in it. It is truly the end of a chapter, but history will look back fondly at him, the grandest of masters, the one who inspired an entire generation.
I first heard of him in Life magazine. He was appearing with the late Rocky Gunn (my mentor) at Caesar's Palace at a convention called "WPI" (now WPPI). He was a very dapper looking gentleman in a suit, wearing a veil so Rocky could pose him as a bride. The topic? "How to make any bride more attractive".
I thought, how bizarre - a convention for wedding photographers? At Caesar's Palace? And there are, what appear to be, wedding photographer superstars? And this made it into Life magazine?
When I first saw the article, I was a guitarist in a band in Santa Barbara, studying Pharmacology, with no idea whatsoever that I myself would become a wedding photographer someday. I didn't even have a camera.
Eventually I would enter this very odd world I saw depicted in the magazine. When I invented Montage, one of the promotional tools Art Leather planned was to have Monte fly in from Maryland to interview me for an infomercial. Nobody knew who I was back then, and everybody knew who Monte was. I was of course in awe of him, and very very nervous. I had the whole thing scripted out, word for word... I labored for many days memorizing and refining that script. When Monte arrived , I presented my script to him, and he said, "no script" and I was now REALLY nervous. It was like Salieri's "Welcome March" manuscript gift to Mozart... labored, unneeded, mediocre!
He did everything he could to make me relax by being incredibly funny. I could tell two things immediately; 1) he has done many of these videos before and 2) he's so good with people, he really knows how to get them to forget about the camera. Once he had me loosened up, I was VERY loose and started behaving by a five year old, and he gave me that stern, disapproving Monte look and all of a sudden yes sir did I start to behave. I was in the presence of a master showman on stage.
If any of you went on the original Montage/Art Leather tour, you may remember this video and the outtakes in the end. There's one clip where Monte freaking puts his hand on my thigh and starts inching upwards. My butt is making a tight fist as I type this. So I start laughing and I said, "I don't know what you're looking for, but you're too low" and Monte said haha, no you're supposed to say you're too high... or something like that. No, he was too low because everything was in retreat!
Monte was gay, and came out publicly in a time when it was relatively rare for people to come out, in an industry where there are very few gays. (my theory is because in that generation, most guys bought cameras so they could take pictures of girls, and I'm not kidding either). But he came out, he did so publicly and so vulnerably, and he explained it to all of us in a way that we could understand and accept him. One impact I'm not sure he really grasped was his affect on opening so many photographers to this world of people of his orientation. Sure, many were in shock to first hear of it, but because he was so admired, to many of us (me included), he was our first gay "friend". For me, he opened the door to a fresh perspective on gay acceptance.
What was wonderful was how quickly everybody accepted this about him, and his star grew even brighter. I remember so often feeling his scratchy beard kiss my cheek and my going ewwww whenever he would kiss me. He knew I would squirm which is why he would run up and kiss me. One time we were all in New Orleans and listening to a group of singers on a street corner, singing something really smooth. Do you remember this Calvin? Louise? Clay? I think it was a Barry White song, and with the warm humidity of summer and the soft glow of the street lamps, I got caught up, got up and started doing my rubbing my nipples pole dancer slutty dance. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Monte coming at me with his hands open ready to grab my ass. All I remember is running about 16 blocks past the end of the French Quarter before I decided I was safe. It was so freaking hilarious.
I made so much fun of Monte in so many ways. And you know, and I can guarantee you this, every single time he's ever seen me he has always had a huge glowing smile and a big hug. My eyes are watering as I write this. I miss Monte. I figured he would always be here.
I don't remember the last time I saw him. I know that I was all amped on this "farewell" dinner in Miami that I was planning recently with Skip Cohen. And then I couldn't go because unbeknownst to me, I had my first ever surprise b-day party coming so circumstances kept popping up. But the pattern was always the same. Huge smile, big hug, furry kiss on cheek and he would be super excited about some new project.. and tell me he's working on something big. Repeat that for 20 years.
Words to describe Monte: sensitive, tender, fragile, humble, proud, in-awe, supportive, your fan, his own fan club, understanding, misunderstood, an icon, a legend. There are only three people I've known closely who, when they enter the room, it is now an event. Rocky Gunn, Denis Reggie and Monte Zucker. When these statesmen enter your room, now it is an important event. Everybody stands a little straighter. At this farewell dinner, I kind of wanted to say sorry for all the times I poked fun at him, but I think he knew that it's my nature to be a brat. If I make fun of you, it's because I like you. While those words didn't get said, I'm sure he knew that I was in awe of him.
Monte is now somewhere safe, peaceful and wonderful. And he can look back on his time on earth, with so many thousands of us feeling a yearning, missing him, and feeling so sad... and deservedly feel that his time here had a huge impact. He lived a powerful life. He came, he saw, he conquered and he had a lot of fun and felt every single emotion an un-myelinated nerve could ever react to. And he left knowing very well that he was loved by all who knew him. I have proof of this by the way. Do you know what it is? I cannot think of a single person in the world who disliked him. And I know a lot of people.
It's 5:30am, and I'm going to roll back under the covers with Melissa, who I can hear quietly toss and turn if I type too loud. But before I do, I'm going to pray to God, ask him to pass a message to my mentor, Monte Zucker. Please tell him that I miss him, that he did REALLY good here, and that I wish him a well-deserved rest in the glowing, warm peace that he's earned.
There is a forum where people are sharing their thoughts at http://www.montezucker.com | | | Posted 3/16/2007 5:11 AM - 450 views - 22 comments
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