Monday, April 30, 2007

• Well, since lots of people have migrated away from xanga...

  i might as well go ahead and let everyone know that i think i need to disappear again. for those of you that don't know, every once in a while i make a willful decision to just disappear. it's kind of seasonal for me...

  in that time i step back from whatever life im living, reassess what direction i am going, formulate a plan, and somewhere in between accept what has happend, accept who i have become, and then move forward.

  i'm certain everyone does this in some form or another...

  if you cycle with me... i'll ride as a team... eventually i fall back... so i can ride alone.

  After finishing the 178 mile bike ride from houston to austin, i was changed. for a few days i felt free. it was a feeling i haven't had since i last layed under the stars and on the white sands of boracay. the crisp clarity of that horizon and that brightly lit sky, was the same feeling as the enveloping winds of the plains of texas on my skin. i felt whole. and i hate to sound sentimental... but i felt in love. it was a definate high that i wished lasted longer. after coming back to houston and getting involved with the many things which i refute to be my reality... that high felt like it was forgotten.    

  my mother tells me since i was a kid i have been surprisingly mature for my age. am i really that mature? or am i still a child? to this day she still calls me an idiot. i can honestly not tell.  i just want to find peace.

  • 12:09 AM
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