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| boo!I'm still happy!
But I have come to terms with something that I think I should accept, because it simply won't do to have my imagination running to all places and spaces anymore; this is reality.
I suppose it was wonderful to imagine, and hope, while it lasted. The wormy feeling was odd but not unwelcome, but now it must end.
I've always thought that I'm too in-between.
I'm an idealist, yet a realist, and it's kinda painful to switch in between because life becomes more and more like Kingda Ka, only it has much much more upping and downing. The ups are great, of course! All ups are great. But the downs are really really really really down and the bitter taste of disappointed hopes feel like the doughnut peach (don't ask) I just ate. It was disgusting, if you wanted to know.
For a moment there I really did hope, you know. I hoped so much that maybe for once I'd be lucky, but I suppose I'm not so lucky after all.
I really don't know ---------
But anyway, the point is! I'm happy, and I'm the only one who makes me happy :)
Lately I've been playing the piano more frequently, during the breaks I take in-between math-doing. And along with it came strangely vivid and colourful dreams. I'm not sure if it's the piano-playing though, but I have a feeling it is. Or it could also be because there's just been so much happening lately my mind is in a whirl!
But whirl no more HCL exam on Monday and I really really have to focus! COME ON SHOO PASS THIS EXAM. YOU CAN DO IT!!! :)
:D
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| running round my head.(i've been listening to my ipod lately, with all the math-doing, and some songs really evoke memories)
She said, "I've got to be honest,
You're wasting your time if you're fishin' around here."
And I said, "You must be mistaken,
I'm not foolin', this feelin' is real."
She said, "You've gotta be crazy!
What do you take me for? Some kinda of easy mark?"
"You've got wits,
You've got looks,
You've got passion,
But I swear that you've got me all wrong."
(But you've got me)
I'll be true, I'll be useful, I'll be cavalier,
I'll be yours my dear
And I'll belong to you
If you just let me through
I said, "I've got to be honest,
I've been waiting for you all of my life."
For so long I thought I was asylum bound,
But just seeing you makes me think twice.
And being with you here makes me sane.
I fear I'll go crazy if you leave my side.
"You've got wits,
You've got looks,
You've got passion,
But are you brave enough to leave with me tonight?"
(You've got me)
This is easy as lovers go. So don't complicate it by hesitating.
This is wonderful as loving goes.
This is tailor made, what's the sense in waiting?
-- As Lovers Go by Dashboard Confessional.
(and this was when i decided that maybe love wasn't so bad after all)
-------------------------------------------------------------
It's amazing how you can speak right to my heart
Without saying a word, you can light up the dark
Try as I may I can never explain
What I hear when you don't say a thing
The smile of your face lets me know that you're near me
There's a truth in your eyes saying you'll never leave me
The touch of your hand says you'll catch me whenever I fall
You say it best when you say nothing at all
All day long I can hear people talking out loud
But when you hold me near you can drown out the crowd
Try as I may I can never define
What's been said between your heart and mine.
-- When You Say Nothing At All by Ronan Keating
(and this was when i thought maybe we could be more)
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But, my God, it's so beautiful when the boy smiles
Wanna hold him, maybe I'll just sing about it.
Cos we can't jump the track
We're like cars on a cable,
And life's like an hourglass glued to the table
No one can find the rewind button, girl.
So cradle your head in your hands,
And breathe, just breathe
Oh breathe, just breathe
There's a light at each end of this tunnel, you shout
Cos you're just as far in as you'll ever be out
And these mistakes you've made, you'll just make them again
If you only try turning around.
-- Breathe (2AM) by Anna Nalick
(and this was when i thought the sun shone from your smile and when i once had hope)
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Head underwater
And they tell me
To breathe easy for a while
breathing gets harder, even I know that
Made room for me;
It's too soon to see
If I'm happy in your hands
I'm unusually hard to hold on to
Blank stares at blank pages
No easy way to say this
You mean well, but you make this hard on me
If your heart is nowhere in it
I don't want it for a minute
Babe, I'll walk the seven seas when I believe that
There's a reason to write you
a love song
Today
-- Love Song by Sara Bareilles
(and this was when i loved to sing and when i thought there simply wasn't anyone for me)
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If I was a flower growing wild and free
All I'd want is you to be my sweet honey bee.
And if I was a tree growing tall and greeen
All I'd want is you to shade me and be my leaves
If you were a river in the mountains tall,
The rumble of your water would be my call.
If you were the winter, I know I'd be the snow
Just as long as you were with me, when the cold winds blow.
If you were a wink, I'd be a nod
If you were a seed, well I'd be a pod.
If you were the floor, I'd wanna be the rug
And if you were a kiss, I know I'd be a hug
If you were the wood, I'd be the fire.
If you were the love, I'd be the desire.
If you were a castle, I'd be your moat,
And if you were an ocean, I'd learn to float.
-- All I Want Is You by Barry Louis Polisar
(and this was when i discovered that love of the rawest, most honest, most "organic" and most simple existed.)
-------------------------------------------------------------
your voice
was the soundtrack of my summer
do you know
you're unlike any other
your eyes
are the brightest of all the colours
i don't wanna
ever love another
you'll always be my thunder
-- Thunder by Boys Like Girls
(and this is now)
Hurhur ignore me.
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| you're unlike any other
------------------------------
AGGG. After this I have to go get ready for Bio presentation. Because I've been happily neglecting Uterine Fibroids and Ovulatory Disorder these past few days :/
Well, at least our poster looks pretty! :)
I'm really too lazy to drag myself there luh oh man oh man oh man I should stop being a pig!
Today, I'm going to complete:
1) MI
2) MA2103
3) Some Chem
4) Chinese paper.
Yes I know ambitious, but desperate times call for desperate measures! X)
Mmmm and it's Friday already. FRIDAY!!!! I've been going out everday until today luhhhhhhhhhhh.
Saturday:
Theory Class then Dinner out
Sunday:
Out in the morning, then out with Tricia to the Esplanade
Monday:
Study with Tricia, Qiu, Joan
SUSHI BUFFET with Qiu and shopping <3
Tuesday:
Math Lecture
Bio Project with Tricia till night :(
Wednesday:
Bio Project with Tricia (AGAIN!) at Attitude
Thursday:
Mom's birthday lunch X)
And today today I have to go to school! Argh I should at least complete MI before then. :)
| | |
| if i was a tree growing tall and green all i'd want is you to shade me and be my leaves.your voice
was the soundtrack of my summer
do you know
you're unlike any other
your eyes
are the brightest of all the colours
i don't wanna
ever love another
you'll always be my thunder
-----------------------------------------------
Todaytoday I am happy :)
I've been happier lately! Which is awesome, because now that I'm happy, I realise how miserable I used to be! I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing though.
Good for me now, because now I'm happy and I know that I wasn't before!
But bad for me last time because I was miserable without even knowing it.
Gosh. I'm so happy happy happy
But maybe I've been a little too happy.
| | |
| you'll always be my thunder.I love waking up to thunder, and the faint sound of water splashing against my window. I love lying there, and not caring whether I'm late for this and that because who cares? It's raining.
I love how the world turns into a hurricane, and every wall to grey stone, and every individual smile becomes like the Sun's replacement as she retired temporarily behind black candyfloss.
You know, in the gloom, every happy thing seems to be magnified tenfold, and you admire it so much more because even in all the darkness, it dared to shine.
Oh, to find the good in a hurricane.
On wet mornings like these, my bed seems just that little bit more deliciously warm and dry and cosy.
And it's so hard to get up.
------------------------------------
"I thought poetry was described as the food of love"
"Oh, of a fine, stout love it may. But if it is but a vague inclination I'm convinced one poor sonnet will kill it stone dead!"
"So what would you recommend, to encourage affection?"
"Dancing. Even if one's partner is barely tolerable!"
-- Pride and Prejudice (the movie)
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Oh booo.
I've been awfully distracted these few days. Ugh ugh ugh I wish I could know what ------------
Oh, poo you.
>:(
Butbutbut -- sometimes it makes my insides squirm and my stomach do backflips that I'm certain is NOT what they're meant to do. X)
------------------------------------
I've FINALLY watched Juno!! (Clap, please!)
It's super duper sweet OMGz if I could but find someone who "thinks the Sun shines out of (my) ass", and makes my heart pound faster everytime I see him.
:(
I think I think I think the rain makes me feel poetic.
X)
Flights of fancy, indeed!
Shanti ; mind over body, anytime. says:
juno is an awesome show
the soundtrack is so quirky and adorable
i don't know what you'd classify it under
(S ♥ says:
Me neither!
It's like..
The songs have the kinda unrefined feel
Like
Shanti ; mind over body, anytime. says:
organic
LOL
(S ♥ says:
I don't know how to describe it!
Shanti ; mind over body, anytime. says:
thats the word i use
organic
just so fresh
and honest also
(S ♥ says:
But it's like love of the simplest and rawest kind
Shanti ; mind over body, anytime. says:
yeah
:D
you get me
haha
i get you
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