Dear Friends and Anonymous Readers,
It is true that everyone on myspace will at some point receive a friend
request from somebody he or she does not know. Sometimes the request
comes from a lonely soul simply looking for another kind soul to talk
to. It could be somebody new to the area looking for tips on the local
scene or- sad but true- some jerk/hussy looking for an ego stroke.
If I were to do a statistical analysis of the friend requests I receive
on a regular basis it would show that the requests from the 19 year old
boy demographic is running at a high percentage. Now I have nothing
against 19 year- old boys. My
baby brother is a 19 year old boy. The
thing that boggles my mind is that the 19 Y.O.B. I am related to wants
little to do with me so how is it I am receiving so much attention from
19 Y.O.Bs on the internet, especially when about half of these dudes
have a top 8 consisting of hussies advertising their unmentionables?
Initially, it looked as though the boys are exclusively from the US of
A (especially coming out of Oregon) but apparently I have a universal
appeal which includes young French Moroccans "looking a woman who to
understand" him and also to like him "basic of it's heart"...whatever
that means but I'm sure it's cute when said with a French accent.
So my friends I ask you: why is this happening? Am I the only one? Is it
because if you google my name you find the website for a porn star? Are
curly fries the equivalent of advertising my unmentionables in the mind
of a 19 year old boy. Is it a scientific fact that it's more than just
dogs and old people that love me?
If you are a 19 year old boy reading this please tell me: why have you
chosen me? And for what's it worth, I changed the diapers of my 19 year
old brother when he was of the diaper wearing age. I could have changed
your diapers. This thought should disturb you. However, if you are
looking for a cool, older-yet-incredibly-young-looking-for-her-age type
sister figure in your life I'm here for you (but I will NOT buy you
beer).
With much wonder and confusion,
Jessica
Comments (10)
hooray for scienceosleep//beer//sufjan weekend!!!!
I just quote Ani Difranco if I reply and that usually takes care of them...
it's like, my favorite author is dostoevsky. don't they even think to themselves what meeting would be like between us? like, what would we talk about? it's just insane.
myspace blows. tom is the antichrist.