LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!
THE OWNER OF THIS XANGA, JONATHAN MEADOWS, HAS RECEIVED THE HONOR OF BEING THE HOST OF THE ANNUAL "TOP TEN MOVIE COUNT DOWN", WHICH IS WHERE THE XANGA'ER, YOUR'S TRULY, WILL COUNT DOWN HIS/MY TOP TEN FAVORITE MOVIES, AND GIVE YOU, THE XANGA'EES, THE MOST DETAILED DESCRIPTION OF THE PLOT HE/I CAN GIVE WITHOUT GIVING IT AWAY! NOW, COMING ALL THE WAY FROM NEW CARLISLE, OHIO, HHEEEEEEERRRE'S JONATHAN!!!! <applause> <applause>
(Jonathan) Thank you! Thank you! You are too kind!
(HOST) GLAD TO HAVE YOU HERE, KIDDO!
(Jonathan) Thank you! Glad to be here! Don't call me kiddo.
(HOST) SORRY, 'BOUT THAT, SONNY! NOW, WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES, OL' BUDDY OL' PAL OL' BUDDY BUDDY OL' PAL?!
(Jonathan) Well, to be honest Ferdinand, (can I call you Ferny?) I just wanna say, Ferny, that I have an entire horde of, well, okay maybe ten favorite movies that I am going to give ya'll a detailed account on. Now, the first movie is "STAR WARS: THE SAGA"!
(HOST) WELL, SHALL WE GET STARTED, OL' BUDDY OL' PAL OL' BUDDY BUDDY OL' PAL?!
(Jonathan) Yeah, I guess so.
Now, to start things off, I just want to say that I'm probably going to give most of the plot away, which is okay because pretty much everybody has seen Star Wars. The saga follows the life of three people. The first is Anakin Skywalker. He's a good guy in Episodes I and II, and most of III. He's also sort of the hero........ Sometimes. Our second hero is Obi-Wan Kenobi. He's Anakin's mentor/master, makeshift brother, and conscience. He, besides Anakin, is the only human to appear in all of the episodes. The third is Luke Skywalker, Anakin's son. Like his father, luke was born on Tatooine, a small desert planet in the Outer Rim. Also like his father, Luke was born with the unquenchable desire to be a Jedi, the basic super heroes/swat/peacekeepers/and religious icons in the Star Wars galaxy. And then there are the Sith. The Star Wars baddies. Well, every movie's got to have a villain, and so Lucas <director> made it a cult. The REAL villain is the mean, the terrifying, the ferocious, the asmatic, DARTH VADER! gasp! Who is actually Anakin, because after a big fight with Obi-Wan on Mustufar, which is a big fire planet, Anakin ------ <WARNING> <WARNING> <SPOILERS AHEAD> < IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN STAR WARS, WHICH IS UNLIKELY, THEN DO NOT GO PAST THIS POINT.> <UNLESS YOU ARE NOT GOING TO SEE STAR WARS, WHICH WOULDN'T SPOIL ANYTHING.> <THANK YOU> <HAVE A NICE DAY> ----Like I was saying, Anakin was severly wounded on Mustufar, via Obi-Wan's lightsaber. And without this really high-tech suit, Anakin would die.
(HOST) WELL, THAT'S ENOUGH FOR NOW. THANK YOU JONATHAN!
(Jonathan) I wasn't done yet.
(HOST) IF YOU SAY ANYTHING ELSE, YOU WILL GIVE EVERYTHING AWAY!
(Jonathan) But I ALREADY gave everything away!
(HOST) I KNOW! IT'S JUST THAT WE'RE OUT OF TIME!
(Jonathan) Oh........... Well, can I at least give them some pictures?
(HOST) WELL, I GUESS SO. BUT BE FAST. I'M ALMOST LATE FOR MY NOSE HAIR TRIM.
(Jonathan) Thanks. Here they are, folks!
This is Anakin from Episode III. Scary, isn't he?
And this is Obi-Wan. He's the hero. Sort of.
The guy on the right is Darth Vader. The guy on the left is Emporer Palpatine. He's one of the guys I didn't mention. He's Darth Vader's master.
And this is another guy I didn't mention. His name is Boba Fett. He's a bounty hunter.
The guy on the right is Han Solo. He's a smuggler and the comedy relief of episodes IV, V, and VI. Bigfoot there on the left is really a wookie, named Chewbacca, or Chewie. He's Han's best friend.
This is Yoda. He's the all-powerfull Jedi. Although he's only like, two feet tall, he's still pretty good with a lightsaber. That's that laser sword that can cut thru anything but another lightsaber blade, and like one or two rare metals. Yoda is holding his lightsaber.
Here's Anakin and Obi fighting it out on Mustufar. Must be very hot there. And with all of those heavy clothes, too. Have these people never heard of "dress for the weather"?
These are different types of Clone Troopers. Clone Troopers are the majority of the army of the Republic. If I'm going too fast for you, please, leave a comment!
This is Darth Maul. He's the villain in Episode I. He seems to be the only one who EVER uses a lightsaber staff. He has horns. Cool, huh?
On the right is Luke Skywalker. In the movies that he is in, he actually resembles his "father", Anakin. Well, maybe a little. On the left is, of course, Yoda. Without his lightsaber. Just thought I'd point that out.
(HOST) THANK YOU, JONATHAN!
(Jonathan) Your welcome sir! See ya'll tomorrow!
(HOST) HAVE A NICE NIGHT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! AND REMEMBER, IF YOU WALK DOWN THE STREET WITH A SMILE ON YOUR FACE, YOU WILL BE SURPRISED HOW MANY PEOPLE WILL STOP AND SAY "WHAT'S SO FUNNY?!"! THANK YOU! GOOD NIGHT, AND GOOD LUCK!
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