Currently Listening Dear You By Jawbreaker see related

This Again

What a freakin' week! My grad party was exactly a week ago. I think it went even better than I expected. Well, I guess that doesn't say much cause I expected very little of it. But oh well, I was content with it. And my parents surprised me with a black jetta! Exactly what I wanted. It's a 2002 (I didn't like any of the models older than that really) and it has a sunroof. The only thing that I don't like is that it's got a cassette player as opposed to CD. Haha. Only flaw. And it's fixable! Cause I can get one and my dad (or at least Danny) knows how to put it in. But I plan on using my i-pod most. Maybe I can find like an i-pod/cd player... Those are probably mad expensive though, if they exist for cars. But anyway. I've had a busy week. Having a car means I have a life now I guess. Except for today. (But I might figure out something out to do tonight.)
Anyway, there's been even more family drama, surrounding Arley again of course. This happened... tuesday? I believe. Hard to keep track of the days in summer. Yeah and my parents are still not talking to each other really. Or sleeping in the same bed. I hate being around the constant awkward bitterness of home. But whatcha gonna do. Kate got dragged into going to a country music concert with her parents today! I feel bad for her. But at least if I'm not going to Mel's or whatever we can do something later, what, I don't know yet. Or well maybe she'll be back in time if I do end up going. I don't know. I think I sort of invited myself so maybe not. Haha. Well this is my first weekend with my car that I'm actually free to do things and I have nothing to do. Most my friends are working, Kate's busy, and Jackie's getting a car(?) which will probably be shared with her brother anyway. Not that we've ever hung out one-on-one anyway. So yeah I don't know what to do with myself. Next week should be better though. Monday I think I might try to hang out with Paul since I haven't done that in awhile. Maybe play guitar hero cause last he knew I seriously sucked, even on easy! So now I'm gonna hustle him hahaha. Just kidding. Then I think tuesday is a beach day for the family, minus dad. And Thursday I think I'm gonna go again to seaside cause it's a free beach day and Tori doesnt have work and well neither do Kate or I, or Jackie if she would really come with us. I hope it all works out. Tori usually sticks to her word about our plans which is cool.
I'm glad I have nothing really to do with this drama. I've been a good kid. But being around it isn't much better. I swear this week has been so bi-polar for me. Like constant ups and downs. Not even just day by day. And I've cried like 3 times which is a lot of pointless crying for me, just cause everything seems so stressful. I don't even have any reason. Guess I'm sorta depressed. But it's weird cause this week had a lot of good in it too. Like I saw the midnight showing for The Dark Knight with Kate and Tori. Then they slept over too, which was cool, even though we pretty much just went to bed cause we got home at 3-3:30 am. Which reminds me, I came home from Tori's party at like 1:30 am last night, I never even told mom when I'd be back or called. And I didnt even get in trouble or anything. And even though I'm 18 and pretty much a college student now, I expected her to keep babying me. I think it's this whole Arley thing though. And well she trusts me I would think. But I didn't mean to take advantage of her lack of discipline (or the will to do anything about it if I were to stay out late). I'm hoping it's just that she trusts me now. And that she knew where I was. I hate seeing my mom sad. And I literally wanted to kick the shit out of Arley the other day for being such a rotten bastard to her. When she asked why we were fighting and I said "He isn't listening to YOU!" she was like "..Oh.". Haha. I am on her side. He thought he was just gonna watch simpsons dvds in the living room right in front of us. And he's grounded. Fucking dick. Like he wanted to show that he CAN do whatever he wants, and mom wasnt gonna do anything about it. So he got all pissed when I shut it off on him. He even threw shit at me. And I didnt even do anything but reinforce mom's power/rules. I hate when he pulls that shit.

Ah man I'm bored. Guess I'll go try and find a job in the ghetto mall or elsewhere. I think close to the Mt. Laurel campus (like Borders!) would be my best option. Eh I don't even know. I just know I need one.

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