Weblog » Archives » May 2008

  • Two pills and some rest.

    Headache of doooooooooom.Unable to type full sentences. Hello.Wanting to call, too scared to. Wondering what I did wrong, ever.Waiting for plans to unfold, looking for the phone.Needing to do projects and invitation-writ…

  • In Japanese...why not?

    こんばんは。今日、あまり授業で勉強しなかったね．．．同級生がサミットがあったので、一日中ここかしこ昼ねした。ブログを読む人が多すぎわね。だから、今度、全部で日本語でタイプする。こんな気持ちは嫌だ。メッチャいやだ!すぐこの気が消える希望な。なぜアタシの友達が最近、不幸なの？この悲しみ、寂しさはもっと嫌な気持ちを持って来たね。とにかく、卒業式やピックニックが来るので、まあいいよ。それを待ってる。その間に、嫌な気持ちが続けてる。読めるなら、大…

  • Weight.

    I don't even know what I want anymore.I don't know, I don't know. Lost in the confusion, I'm confusing my own feelings with fiction.Dramas stifle my actual confusion - decided on our own, losing what would have been.I ha…

  • Clearing things up.

    Fucking misunderstandings and pure stupidity.Half an hour later, I sat on my stairs crying like an idiot. I think the whole neighborhood heard.I'd start from the beginning, but where is that? When I was born, when you we…

  • Tears.

    Sometimes you just sit in the sunlight and an overwhelming sadness hits you.It seems pointless at times to live without another.And though I felt complete two nights ago, I feel as empty as the broken bowl in the trash n…

  • I'm not sure what I wanted to say...

    I feel like saying something AMAZING, something so mind-blowingly awesome that you all fall down. My arrival home spiralled down from a productive afternoon to an extended nap...And instead of inspiring the world, I'm dr…

  • Incompetent teachers

    I blame my poor writing skills on the increasingly stupid English teachers I have had.Just when I think one has driven me to the brink of insanity, I enroll in a class even worse than the last and spiral down. Forget my …

  • Complete.

    It'll drive me mad, the joy and confusion I feel.To find someone who COMPLETES you. What's even better, it's a sweet taste like candy, fresh like toothpaste, and simple as lying down in the grass on a warm day. It tickle…

  • That's karma for you

    Remember back in this entry when I was locked out of my house?Oh, the joy! I came back today from school dead tired, and swore I'd only take a short nap.I woke up more than an hour later at my dad raving mad."You didn't …

  • Lazy Sundays

    Rarely do I get the chance to sleep in, but now that my family is allowing me to go to church on my own, I'm staying up playing games. I really couldn't go back to sleep when I was forced to get out of bed at 6:30 though…

  • Ohm nom nom.

    I'm getting so paranoid about losing weight now.Flipping through my Health Ed textbook only makes me panic more. I'm so scared of having an eating disorder. And even after all this studying of anorexia nervosa and such, …

  • Record Temperatures

    I'm handling the heat relatively well.In fact, for most of the morning I thought it was "cold"; but then again, I also stayed indoors all morning. It was only when I stepped OUTSIDE in the sun to walk up the shorter path…

  • And two hours later...

    Getting locked out of my house no fun. Knocking until my knuckles are raw isn't fun either.But you know what's the least fun of all? Finding out your father was home the whole time.I got bored and hunched over on my stai…

  • No means no!

    Happy half-birthday to me - only 6 more months and I'm an adult.Unfortunately, it seems like my friends, who are all older than me, are deaf.In an effort to get back to a healthy weight, I'm sticking to 3 meals only, no …

  • Spinning on a swing

    Mm, I really do love screwing myself over.I have no more AP exams - I'm finished for the rest of my high school career with that method of torture. For now, I'm spinning in my chair listening to John Mayer instead of doi…

  • Discovery

    Two books in two days, and I'm going insane with the fact that I've come to terms with myself.I don't know if it's apathy taking over, because I'm sick of whining about myself.Maybe it's because I haven't been focusing o…

  • Forgive me all my trespasses.

    Eponine is my hero. "To love another person is to see the face of God..."Sometimes I get sick of listening to the soundtrack of Les Miserables, but as I sit here, I can't stop. I really can't enjoy sleeping anymore, so I…

  • Disappointments, over and over.

    I wish I could write a letter to myself in the past, or more specifically, the freshman me.No matter how many times I tell myself DON'T REGRET WHAT YOU'VE DONE, I really can't help but want to change everything in the pa…

  • Expectations.

    I cannot be what I was before. He tells me I should not blame my teachers, I should blame my own shortcomings. My grades have spiraled down - at the cost of trying to get a better score on the AP Calculus exam (which I j…

  • I'm such a liar.

    I know I said I would go on hiatus because of AP exams, but here I am, two days before Calculus. I couldn't help it, I wanted to write something about HIM. But not about HIM, not the boy far away whom I never see, who ha…

novemberwind

  • Visit novemberwind's Xanga Site
    • Name: Alexandra
    • Country: United States
    • State: California
    • Birthday: 11/13/1990
    • Gender: Female
    • Member Since: 9/8/2003

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