I feel kind of sad. I  just doubt I will make it with all those exams. And then I feel like a failure since I had never failed an exam before, so this is the first time I have to do a second round.

Patrick tells me that I shouldn't feel stupid, but intelligent, because for someone who had just started learnilng french it is imposible to pass any university leavle courses, and I passed 10 of them. I guess he is right, but still I feel  so stupid.

I don't want to repeat the year, I don't want us to HAVE to get merried for me to stay in belgium, I don't want to disapoint my family nor his family.

Worst part of it is that I feel so down that I find it too hard to concentrate and get work done.... and if I don't do my papers nor study then I am sure to fail.

Once the exams are over I think I really will look for a psychologyst and get myself enrolled into some kind of sport.