Saturday, May 17, 2008

• Permanent Grin

  I've got a permanent grin on my face. Today is freaking gorgeous, I slept till 10am, which is shocking, because my body normally balks and forces me to rise about 8am. I guess all those opens at the Bux are fading from my memory and my sleep schedule has adjusted accordingly. Woot!
  
  I took a personality test yesterday because I'm now on "ministry staff" at church. I use the term loosely, because I've been involved in both the kids and worship ministries for the past year, but now that I'm doing the website and all the media, I'm on "staff". No associated paycheck, but that's ok. God's got my back. But because of my status as staff, I have to take a personality test to see how I fit with the pastor and other staff(all the young adults who are my friends). I'm Expressive/Dominant (High) based on this Persogenics thingy, which basically means I like to talk. A lot. And people listen to me, but I need to listen to others more. I like to lead stuff, I'm loud and expressive in my opinions and I have a lot of ideas. I'm the same personality as my pastor, which I guess is why we "get" each other. When he goes on an ADD tangent, I get it. I do the same thing. haha! I've taken so many of these over the past 10 years, it's hilarious. I've changed. A lot. I've gone from a shy, reserved bookworm as a teen, to someone who probably utilizes charm to get what she wants, likes to be the center of attention and seeks social situations. In some ways, I don't think I like me. Dominant personalities types used to be my arch-nemesis - I didn't like them because they were overbearing and controlling. I dislike people that interrupt and talk over people, but I do it nonetheless. I see these things in myself and I find it aggravating. I don't mind being a leader, I just wish I could guarantee that I would never be controlling. I don't mind being effusive or bubbly, I just wish I could control my proclivity to be loud and obnoxious. I'm grateful that I have the ability to communicate and speak easily, I just wish I could curb my desire to talk all the time. Sure it's good that I see these flaws, but it's one thing to recognize them and another thing to consciously change. I find myself checking myself in situations & apologizing, which I guess is good (the profile said I could basically run over people, but that I saw it and fixed it). Bah! Such is life. The need for growth and change is never ending .

   

  • 10:48 AM
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