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theblackspiderman
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Name: Spidey
Country: United States
State: Pennsylvania
Metro: Philadelphia
Gender: Male
Interests: WRITING WRITING AND MORE WRITING. Also: friends, Philadelphia, Sports, sticking it to the man, kissing in the rain, giving out good advice, giving someone a high five, little kids hugging your legs, and making memories.
Expertise: Fixing things. Any kind of things.
Educating, writing, advice, freestyling, reading out loud, being nice, sports
Occupation: Computer related, unless you w
Industry: I'm not industry, I'm in da st
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  MisterHygiene
MSN: MisterHygiene
Yahoo:  MisterHygiene
Member Since:
10/15/2004
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| Demotivation - Xanga StyleIf you've been around the interweb block, you've probably run into these:
  Yep, de-motivation posters. Well here are some you might like, Xanga-Style. But you don't have to take my word for it. *reading rainbow sound effect* | | |
| Spidey's Super Sweet Someteen Survey...thingy.Yes, I have finally copied the pasta.
I think I've been tagged like eleventy billion times, so I might as well. Right?
Hold on to your hats.
...no seriously.
When Spidey says "hold on to your hats" he isn't making casual cliche references. You should be quite literally holding onto your hats.
If you don't have a hat, go get one, put it on, and then come back and read this.
The sillier the hat, the better.
Spidey's Secret Sweet Someteen Facts (Salacious!)
1. I literally find beauty in all shapes and sizes.
I've dated sizes 1-14, 4'10-5'11, and five different races (no, the mixed ones do not count as two)
2. I was really tall up for my age up until about 5th or 6th grade.
Then the rest of my friends kept growing, and I pretty much stayed put.
3. I own a lot of books.
...and comic books.
I got started on comic books by my dad around the age of 5-6. I remember he had Green Lantern, and X-Men...which was his favorite.
 (one of the first issues I remember reading)
When I was around thirteen I started to collect them, along with budding baseball/football/basketball card collection...I mostly read them for the art and to follow my favorite characters.
Around college age I started reading comics more for the stories and authors.
Some of my favorite writers are also some of my favorite fiction/novel writers as well.
Brian Michael Bendis, Brad Meltzer, Alan Moore, Frank Miller, Neil Gaiman, Brian K. Vaughn...just to name a few.
4. I have a recent obsession with smelling good. I think I currently have four bottles of cologne on my dresser right now.
Davidoff Blue, Polo Black, Curve Crush, and Versace Blue Jeans.
5. All that relationship advice I'm pretty good at writing? Most of it I learned from a two-and-a-half year relationship with a very high maintenance ex-girlfriend/fiance.
...breaking up with her was the hardest thing I've ever done.
Why did I do it?
a) She cheated
b) No direction in her life
...and that's all I'm going to say about that.
6. I love sports...especially my Philadelphia teams.
When the Eagles lost the 2004 NFC Championship Game?
I cried a little.
7. Early on in high school, I was determined to make the NBA - or at least play Division I college basketball.
I never made it.
But a kid I used to play with in the neighborhood did.
 Jameer Nelson, of the Orlando Magic
I knew him when he was just Jameer Nelson, lives on Harshaw Road.
8. One of the first things I did when I moved out of my house was eat a whole bowl of cake batter.
...it wasn't one of the smartest things I've ever done.
9. I remember every girl's name I've ever kissed.
No, I will not tell you how many it's been.
10. Marriage sometimes scares me.
Not because I'm afraid of committment.
It's because so many married people I know bore me to tears.
11. When I was younger, I used to be REALLY oblivious to when a girl liked me
Now I look back and I'm like HOW DID I NOT REALIZE THAT?
Once, my best friend at the time was extremely angry at me for leading his sister on.
...I had no idea she even liked me.
 Oh, DUH!
12. I really like cute things.
...babies, and small animals in particular.
 Gah, why am I such a softie? 13. I spent an inordinate amount of time as a kid playing video games.The Street Fighter games, Mortal Kombatses, and LOTS and LOTS of NES and SNES games. I'd rent games from Blockbuster or West Coast video, and beat them in 2-3 days. There's no telling how many quarters I spent in arcades over the years. 14. I want a tattoo, but I can never decide on what exactly I want to get. I'm pretty sure I want it on my back or shoulders, though. 15. Sometimes, I like to imagine alternate versions of my life.Like what would it be like if I had gone to college in Ohio. ...or gotten married to my ex-fiance ...or stayed at my 2nd job ...or kept playing football in high school It's always fun or interesting though, I don't have any regrets. 16. I have a really wide, eclectic taste in music. If you checked out my playlists you'd find everything except probably death metal, and opera. Seriously. Showtunes, hip hop, hair metal, grunge, indie rock, bubble gum pop, techno, trip hop, gangsta rap, classical, country music(more old country singers than new school, though), R&B(new and old school), tv/cartoon theme songs(my fave), etc etc etc etc. So there you have it. 88 lines about 44 women. I mean, 16 things about one me. Now you know.  Current mood: p.s. I'm not tagging anyone, because I don't think there is anyone left that hasn't done this...but if you wanna do one, go for it. | | |
| All Blogs go to HeavenHi.
*stands up*
My name is Spidey, and I'm a recovering blog snob.
Let me tell you my story.
It used to be, 90% of every blog I saw - I didn't like. Not that I hated it, but there was always something I didn't like about it.
Layout.
Font.
Content.
Colors.
Writing style.
Lack of humor.
Something.
I didn't consider myself to be the world's greatest blogger. I'm sure there are like 10, 1,000,000 better than I.
But I did consider myself to be better than most out there...and this was much before "xangalebrity" status.
(I think I topped 500 subscribers mid-'07...which really isn't even that many, and I started late '04)
So if you've been on xanga for any substantial amount of time, you might notice:
There are people who like the "popular" Xangans
and people who dislike the "popular" Xangans...I think oftentimes because of what they stand for.
To some, they're the captain of the football team, the head cheerleader, the movie stars, the "popular kids" ... the ones who for some reason Xanga has decided to highlight, as if those who make the call on featured are giving their stamp of approval and validating that you are indeed, a worthwhile blogger.
 This does NOT exist.
Anywhere.
Some think that there is some clandestine ritual that you must be involved with before you get featured. Something involving dark robes, absinthe, candle wax, and power ranger masks.
Some others think it involves months and months of xanga staff kissing up, involving sending them Starbucks, flowers, Godiva chocolate, and commenting on everyone's page who has more than thirty comments on a regular basis.
 "I'm sure to get featured now! Dan loves caramel frappacinos!"
...while those things might help, (especially the Starbucks) they are not the automatic answer to featurement.
There's already "guides" out there on how to make yourself a killer blog.
DBF21 and AvenueToTheReal have done entries recently, as a matter of fact.
What I'm here to tell you is...
There is no such thing as a bad blog.
Sure, your layout could be a little easier to read.
Sure, not everyone appreciates the Slipknot playing at seventeen decibels when your page loads.
Maybe your blogs are just a journal-style depiction of what you did today.
You might even be a poor speller.
Or one who TyPeZ LyK DiS.
It's YOUR blog. Who am I(or anyone else) to tell you what it should or shouldn't be?
No one, that's who.
Not the Care Bears.
Not Sarah Palin.
Not Bin Laden.
It's supposed to be whatever you make it to be.
Dark. Witty. Diary-style. Ranty. Contemplative. Sexy. Friendly. Pictureful. Political.
Me? I came up with the concept of "The Weapon of Mass Instruction" 3 years ago, and that's what I try for...information wrapped up in a light, tasty tortilla of humor...and occasionally a project that attempts to bring the xanga community closer together.
...and tangy salsa.
Now if you WANT to be featured and can't seem to get there? Well again, read some guides.
OR
Xanga has these new things called "Plugz"...which basically allows you to feature yourself.
Yep. For the cost of a Big N' Tasty value meal, you can put yourself up on everyone's page to check out.
So there ya go, some recognition for your awesome posts.
Now go out there and get to writing, and remember - if anyone tells you how to blog - tell 'em Spidey said:
"All I have to do is stay black and die!""Winners don't use drugs!""Go Shawtay, itz ya birfday.""It's my blog, and I'll do what I want!"Current mood: p.s. The one exception to the rule is if you're writing racist, ignorant, hateful, or abusive things. Save that for a pen and a pad and your own small mind. | | |
| XangStars - Xanga's First Reality Show!What?
...Oh yes.
Seven Xangans...
Who've never met.In one house.On Spring Break.
SEE WHAT IT'S LIKE WHEN THE EPROPS AND COMMENTS ARE OFF AND IT'S EVERY XANGAN FOR THEMSELVES.
The Concept:
• I am trying to get 6-7 other Xangans (3 girls, 3 guys...or 4-3 either way) to go on Spring Break for a week with me in 2009. We'll film most of the day - either by ourselves, or maybe we can get someone to be the camera person(someone who works for Xanga would be perfect)
• We'll film most moments of the day, then the next morning - cut the video down to 30-40 minutes or so.
• There will be challenges...but no one will be sent home, obviously. However there will be circumstances for the losing teams/people.
• It will be posted publicly so everyone can comment on what happened on the "episode". (ideally the front page...I mean who is really watching "Bobcam?")
When/Where:
• Most likely the 2nd or 3rd week in March.
• Depending on who is going, we'll see where's most affordable. I'm thinking either Panama City, FL or Daytona Beach...but if people can swing it, perhaps Cancun.
• If 6-7 people dedicate themselves to absolutely coming, I will personally put aside a paycheck and pay for accomodations myself.
What we'll need:
• You, Xanga.
To watch, write about. Comment. Prop. Visit. Tell us who you like, who you dislike.
• Ideas for challenges! Give 'em to us!
• Someone to make a killer logo for this...we could sell it at the BFN Xanga store on shirts, I'm sure. Right Ed? I'm decent at photoshop, but I'm sure there are a lot of people better than I am.
...no need to email it to me, just upload it to your photoblog and let me know when you post it.
We can have people vote on it, have a little non-competitive mini-contest.
• 6-7 Xangans to "Audition" for the show. Write a blog, or do a video blog, ideally. (Not due till December or so)
Xangans/Contestants must be:
- 21 or over (Spring break can be wild)
- Single (why single? Ever watch Making the Band? They never follow the girl who is a homebody or the girl who's married...not good for TV...and if you make a love connection I'm not gonna responsible for your breakup)
- Able to take off a week in March (most likely 1st or 2nd week)
- FUN...and a bit crazy...at least willing to do off-the-wall things for the sake of the show.
• People who don't need to audition whatsoever:
WhereTheFishLives (#1 Xanga celeb already)
CakaLusa (The All-Time Great)
c0rkie (Winner of Miss Xanga Asia - Or any of the top 5 who are single)
RT_184 (Does anyone else write crazier real-life stories?)
A single Drakonskyr (he's too nice when he has a girl)
Whoever wins Mr. X-Rated
...Tell me in the comments who else you'd like to see!
Someone on the trip who knows how to do video editing, so we can film all day - edit the next morning and post at prime time. Or do all the filming in that week - then edit it and post it like a five-six week "show."
What would be IDEAL aka My Dream Scenario:
• We can get Xanga to promote the heck out of this, possibly even market it, and get it sponsored (Axe? Red Bull? Jolt? etc...I'm sure the contestants would wear t-shirts for a free week somewhere) and bring it back for a second season in the Summer time.
• Camcorders...something that outputs directly to PC/Mac...and records in HD.
• Someone who wants to come and just do camera work/video editing. (again, it'd be awesome if they worked with Xanga)
• Laptops. So people can post on their sites, and edit video.
• This will NOT be hosted on my site, just in case you think it's some ploy for me to hoard all the traffic.
...Ideally this will be it's own Xanga page with links to all of the contestants.
I'm sure I'll come up with more things...this is the result of a few nights of laying in bed not being able to sleep...because I was thinking about this.
...wait.
I think about Xanga in bed? Whatever happened to Rosario Dawson? Hillary Duff? Halle Berry? Smurfette? Megan Fox?
*sigh*
This is going to be potentially either:
a) The most epic thing ever to happen on Xanga
b) A LOT of fun...and at least a week's worth of things to blog about.
There's no way this can not be great...unless no one participates at all.
Also, if anyone is in marketing or has some more ideas about how to make this as big as possible, send them to me or to the TheXangaTeam.
We need connections, connections, connections. Anyone who knows/does marketing, travel agents, promotion, has links to getting equipment, funding, sponsors, production companies...Let's show everyone what Xanga can do when we work together...Hey, Tila Tequila got a show on MTV, and you're gonna tell me we're not cooler than her?
Psh.
I also NEVER ask people to comment or recommend...but I am now.
I'm out like fat on The Biggest Loser.
Current mood:
Comment!
Need challenges! Contestants!
Recommend!
No one should miss out on the fun!
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| The Game Killers.My last entry was all about different little things you can do to show your girl love and affection.
When people are truly in love, it's a rare and beautiful thing.
I've been there, I understand what it's like to have that poetry-inspiring, make-your-knees-weak, can't-wait-to-see-you-again, love.
But before that, you need to cultivate a relationship.
Unfortunately, some relationships are doomed to fail BEFORE THEY EVEN HAVE A CHANCE TO START. There are those who would squash your dreams before they become any more than a nice thought.
But why? Who would do such a terrible thing?
These villainous people:
Spidey's Official list of GAMEKILLERS™
1. Starving Sabrina "Two all beef patties, special sauce, but hold the attention from boys, please."
Starving Sabrina isn't necessarily a big girl, but she's always hungry at the most inopportune times.
Right when you start to hit it off with her friend, she reminds her friend that she is SOOO HUNGRY! She may have been saying it all night, but at some point she will tug her friends arm and exclaim:
"Girl, can we PLEASE get something to eat? I haven't had anything since that club salad at lunch, I am going to DIE here!" .. or something to that effect.
I mean, no one wants their friend to die, right? Sorry Casanova, but while you're charming, I can't have a friends' death on my conscious.
...It also seems like she always wants either nachos or pizza, too.
Maybe guys should try bringing lunchables in a backpack for these moments. A hot pocket perhaps?
2. Texting Tiffany "IDK, Some place with wack ppl. They did play our song tho lol"
Ah, Texting Tiffany HAS a boyfriend - she's just coming along with her friends for the ride. She'll likely spend her entire evening nursing a single Corona, her face illuminated by the glow of a cell phone, completely absorbed in her little T9 world.
absolutely. bored.
Don't try to talk to her or involve her in the conversation, she'll most likely respond by rolling her eyes, blowing her hair out of her eyes, or some other expression of contempt.
She'll either respond: "I have a boyfriend" or "why do you wanna know?"
And return to working her thumbs on her Sidekick™ like she's playing Contra on NES:
"OMG WTF IS IT WITH THESE GUYS, I WISH U WERE HERE BABES LOL XOXO MWAH"
Yeesh, excuse me for living Tiffany.
By the way, I hope your boyfriend is ugly and uninteresting.
...and xoxo MWAH is redundant. B T W.
3. Wasted Wendy "I'm not sleep, I'm just checking out the backs of my eyelids. Yep, still there."
Wasted Wendy, why can't you know your limits!??! You should've known better than to have six shots of jager before you went out, then had four cranberry and vodkas before 11pm!
Now, it's midnight...you're stumbling around the bar talking to your reflection, making out with really shady looking guys, and telling your friends that you are going to take a fifteen minute nap outside on the sidewalk.
Argh, you just took a fun evening out with your friends and made it into a game of "Hey, where's Wendy? Someone needs to make sure to hold her hair!"
Babysitting can be fun when you're taking care of cute kids.
NOT when you're taking care of a grown up who really, really shouldn't be attempting to dance on a bar.
In a skirt.
and having old men do body shots off of her.
Ew.
Don't be so selfish Wendy, your friends should be meeting classy hot moderately attractive guys, not taking you home at 12:30 so you don't fall asleep or get kidnapped.
4. The Miserable Mom "Seriously you two, this is the last picture. I need to wake up at 9am tomorrow and do yoga."
I have to say, the "moms" (not actually moms, just act like them) are the absolute #1 public enemy when it comes to fun in a social context. Her main priority seems to be keeping any member of the group from straying out of line-of-sight vision, and making sure everyone is at home at a "decent hour".
No you may not have her friends number.
No she does not want to dance.
No, she does not want a drink, unless you want to get her a cranberry juice...maybe if she's feeling excited, a diet coke.
NO NO NO
5. Get-down Gina "Ooooh, pass the peanut butter girllll, this is my JAM!"
Get-down Gina is a special case. She tends to appear when you're at a place that has a not-so-loud bar...but also mind-numbingly, ear-ringingly, I-have-to-shout-in-your-ear loud dance floor.
While you talk to her friend, engaging her in conversation about everything from how you miss good 90's cartoons, to how to stimulate the economy...her friend is tugging at her arm, bobbing up and down like she has to pee.
She doesn't have to pee, though.
She has to DANCE...and she won't stop till she gets enough.
Ack. Now what? The dance floor isn't always a good place for a conversation...plus how are you supposed to explain your economic theories with Danity Kane screaming in your ear about how they're damaged?
...to add to that, you might not know how to dance.
If you CAN dance(thankfully I can), you might be able to deal with this, especially if Gina finds another guy on the dance floor and doesn't end up doing that weird psuedo-grind on her girlfriend all night and monopolizing her time.
6. Mr. Inappropriate
"Hey baby, I'm not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock!"
As you probably guessed, it's a guy. Always.
He has a penchant for saying the worst possible thing at the worst possible moment to completely ruin your chance with the ladies.
For example:
Scenario 1: Two pretty girls, good friends...enjoying your company, everyone's laughing, having a good time.
Mr. I: "So you know what I've been thinking? You two should totally make out right now."
Girls: "Ew you guys are gross! Gah! So immature! Let's go Ashley!"
You: "But wait! I never thought that! Come back! ... Mr. I, prepare to meet your maker."
Scenario 2: You chatting up a pretty girl, things are going well, Mr. I wanders over from the bar.
Mr. I: "Hey guys, how's it going? Hey, you know that girl you thought was hot earlier from across the room? I saw her up close, she was actually really fat."
You: "I...uh...actually didn't...um..."
Her: "I have to go."
Some people just don't have that "filter" from the brain to the mouth. I know we laugh about everything normally, but PLEASE don't do racial, disability, religious, or political jokes when we're out...as a matter of fact, stay far away from me when I'm near females, Mr. I.
7. Dr. Disillusioned "I ... just wanna go home. Lara Croft has never hurt me."
Dr. D can be either a girl or a boy, and it's usually one who has just gone through a breakup...or several breakups. As a matter of fact, you can pretty much substitute "disillusioned" for "downer". Basically, they have little to no faith in the quality of humans left on the planet, especially the opposite sex.
So when you spot those two hot girls/guys/marsupials across the bar smiling at you? Your wingman basically has the morale of an Atari employee in 1988.
You: "Hey let's go talk to them, they're really hot and definitely smiling at us."
Dr. D: "Why? So we can get to know them, and they can break our hearts into a million little pieces six months later? No thanks, I'd rather save myself the emotional trauma, not to mention the time and money. You go."
You: "...I'm going to punch you."
Good grief Dr. D, get over them already. I promise you they weren't THAT great.
8. The Big Leaguers
 "Hey Cindy, who's your friend?"
Ahhh...almost everyone has one of these. An extremely attractive friend that steals your shine like Miley Cyrus did to Hillary Duff. Sometimes your attractive friend can work in your favor, since people want to talk to them, you get to talk to everyone too.
Or...this:
Cue actual scenario from my life three weeks ago:
At a Phillies game with my roomate(bodybuilder physique, light blue eyes-type)
Two girls come and stand right next to me at the outfield fence. I immediately start to talk to them.
"Oh hey...I turned around and my roomate wasn't there, I was about to say, "Man Jason, you smell good...is that...Victoria's Secret?"
They laughed...and it was indeed Victoria's secret. Boom, right on the money. Darn I'm good.
I proceed to chat them up, find out one is single. My roomate interjects about once every five minutes, as he is in pain(he has a spine injury from MMA fighting and is on muscle relaxers)...but I am the one keeping conversation going, making them laugh.
Fastforward.........................
Before we part ways, the non-single one says: "Hey, is your roomate single?"
"Nope!"
"Too bad, my friend thought he was really cute."
...HEY! What am I? Chewed gum? I just spent the last hour doing hilarious standup comedy and trying to get you a ball from the bullpen!"
*forehead slap*
Ah well, at least it was dollar-dog night.
Remember everyone try not to hate the player...OR the game.
You are allowed to hate really terrible DJ's though.
I'm out like the Browns playoffs chances.
Current mood:
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